A Human’s Guide to Surviving Magical Mishaps by Kit Bryan
Rule 66- Avoid unwanted phone calls by pretending to be a telemarketer when answering your phone.

I make hot chocolates for Ashton and I and after peering into the living room I make a third one for Lucy who is apparently still awake. After convincing Ashton to go back to bed and rest some more, I creep into the living room trying not to bother Fin and hand Lucy her drink. She's watching some cheesy rom com while semi napping on the couch and casting concerned glances over to the corner of the room where Fin is sleeping behind the couch barricade. I doubt that we are getting anything done today. We're all too exhausted. I've had more sleep than everyone and I'm still tired. I sit with Lucy and we watch bad movies together while we finally take the chance to relax

"Should we wake them?" I hear Fin saying softly. I open my eyes to see Ashton and Fin are both awake and standing in the corner of the living room whispering to each other. Lucy and I are both kind of curled up on the couch together, I'm fairly sure her head is on my stomach so I doubt that she's awake.

"We are grown men, we should not need assistance to manage a single meal. Perhaps we can find something to put together in the kitchen.” Ashton suggests.

"Even back home where we know what everything is, neither of us is a particularly accomplished cook." Fin points out.

"I think I can use the toaster now without burning anything." Ashton suggests hesitantly. That's enough for me to bolt up, dislodging Lucy who groans and rolls back into the couch, refusing to wake up. I carefully get off the couch and approach them.

"Calm down, I'll make something. Just please don't burn our house down." I say, half joking and half serious.

"You had a long night. You should not have to always take care of us." Ashton objects and I laugh then glance at Lucy and do my best to stifle it, although I doubt we will wake her if she isn't ready to get up.

“Ashton that is quite literally what you hired me for. Now let's go see what we can find in the kitchen. You both must be starving. It's practically dinner time.”

Forty minutes later I present the guys with a passable pasta dish. I'm not the world's best cook but I don't have take out EVERY day usually. Maybe every other day... As if summoned by magic, or the smell of dinner, Lucy comes rushing into the kitchen and takes her seat. For someone who was solidly asleep five minutes ago she is very... bouncy. We all look a little worse for wear though. Lucy is still in her nice dress, and the rest of us are in sleeping clothes. My hair looks TERRIBLE I'm sure. I need a shower, no more than that, I need to take a bath and go all out. Bubble bath, soaking, hair treatments, leg shaving, expensive body wash. I mentally add it to my to do list. Ashton and Fin both look disgustingly good despite being a little worn out. It's almost insulting, although I can't help but be amused by the slightly lopsided braid Fin's hair is tied in. He's such a put together person that the messy hairstyle looks odd on him.

After dinner I excuse myself for a quick shower. I'm not ready to have a proper bath when I have so many guests to see to. When I return I can't help but grin at the scene in front of me. Lucy has her hands tangled in Fin's hair as she redoes hi hair. She's trying to point with her nose at something on my phone while Ashton fumbles with it. The phone is vibrating in his hand.

"Just hit the red button to decline the call." She instructs him.

"I am trying. I think I may be doing something wrong." he admits.

"How? It's one button? Just hit the red button to decline the call!" She repeats. Ashton taps on the screen and the vibrating stops. He seems relieved until a quiet voice sounds through the phone.

"Hello... Hello?" The voice calls out. Ashton looks horrified.

"I did not mean to... What should I do?" He is panicking.

"Hang up!" Lucy half yells.

"I do not know how!" Ashton argues back, dropping the phone onto the table. I walk in and snatch the phone off the table. Oh damn, the call Ashton accidentally took is from mayor Simmons. Reluctantly I put my phone up to my ear. "Hello? Are you there? Miss Fall? Do we have a bad connection?" He demands.

"Sorry, Ashton tried answering my phone and had a little trouble. I'm here." I apologise.

"I've been calling you ALL DAY." Simmons grumbles.

"Sorry, we had a late night. I was sleeping." I say casually, my apology sounds insincere even to me, but I can't be bothered faking it.

"Very well." Simmons does not sound happy.

"I assume you have plenty to tell me." He prompts me. There's no point trying to deny that Fin is here at this point. It might be time to bend the truth a little. I feel slightly bad about it since he IS only trying to do his job, but my job is to help Ashton and that's what I'm doing. At least I hope I am.

"Yeah, it was a real shock, a friend of Ashton's showed up. Another fae. He just turned up with no warning, it was so surprising. He asked to stay with me too, he's working with Ashton to get the fae criminals. He thought he might need some backup I guess. The other good news is we caught another criminal though. A fae woman. She's been arrested and shouldn't be causing any more trouble. There's only one left to capture now." I say cheerfully. Simmons barely reacts to that news and refuses to let me redirect his attention.

"That's great news, now tell me more about this new fae visitor." he demands.

"Oh he's great. His name is Finvara Kirn and I think he might be the most reasonable and responsible person I've ever met. You don't have to worry about him causing trouble." I assure him. Ashton raises an eyebrow at me but Fin barely seems to be listening. Lucy is certainly taking her time fixing his hair and he seems to be enjoying it. Actually, she is definitely taking her time. I've had her throw my hair in a perfect braid for work in under a minute on multiple occasions. "What else have you learned about the fae?" Simmons demands.

"Oh, well I've been asleep all day so we haven't had much time to talk.” I remind him and he sighs dramatically.

"Fine. But find out what you can and let me know. It's unacceptable for these fae to just be turning up with no warning." he grumbles. Apparently he's done with subtle requests for asking me to spy on the fae and is straight up telling me now That or he's so flustered that he's forgotten to pretend that he isn't worried by them.

"I'll tell you if there's anything worth sharing." I promise. I'm the one who will decide what is worth sharing. For example, I don't think it's worth sharing that Fin didn't just arrive. Simmons just assumed that and I have no intention of correcting him. We trade pleasantries for a minute or two then eventually end the call.

"Thankyou for not revealing your prior knowledge of my presence." Fin remarks and I wave him off.

"I kept it a secret, if I admitted it now it would only piss Simmons off." I remind him.

"That was just as much for me as it was for you."