Boomerangers: A second chance romantic comedy (Cajun Girls Book 1)
Boomerangers: Chapter 3

“Coop,” Momma calls from the sink where she’s washing dishes. “Can you go grab the mail? I just saw the truck pass and I’m waiting on some Avon.”

That woman and her Avon. I close the case files I’ve been working on for the past two hours. My eyes could use a break, anyway. “Sure, Ma.”

As I’m making my way into the foyer to grab my tennis shoes, I can’t help but notice how everything is still exactly the same as it was when I lived here fifteen years ago. The same pictures hang in the same spots. The floral sofa set that no one’s ever been allowed to sit on still sits in pristine condition on the white carpet that years later still looks brand new. I open the front door, stepping out onto the wraparound porch. The same two rocking chairs that have been there for as long as I can remember sit to my left, and the old wood swing still hangs on the right. It’s like stepping into a time capsule.

When I sprint down the steps, the bottom one gives a little, creaking beneath my weight, just like I expect it to.

I’m jogging down the long drive that runs parallel to the LeBlanc’s, who’ve been our neighbors since before I was born, when my eyes wander over to their house and spot an unfamiliar vehicle. I’ve been back here for almost two weeks and I’ve never seen that black Tahoe before today. I slow my gait, being the nosy neighbor that I am, curious to see who’s paying Mrs. Elaine a visit this early on a Saturday.

I hear her before I see her. “Landon, I’ve had about enough of your attitude for one day already.”

Spence is still raising hell. The sound of her screeching brings a nostalgic smile to my face. I used to love to get that girl’s panties in a twist. Hell, I used to love to get into that girl’s panties.

I switch directions, heading toward the LeBlanc house to say hello.

As I’m approaching the truck, I hear her yell at Landon again. “Go help your brother get our stuff out of the car.” I watch as two dirty blond teens walk around to the back and pop the hatch open. Bags begin tumbling out. Damn. How long are they planning to visit?

The driver’s side door swings open and Spence climbs out. Immediately, our eyes lock. She looks me up and down as I take in the beautiful chaos that stands before me. Her raven hair is in a huge knot on top of her head. She’s in yoga pants and a threadbare tee with flip-flops and not a stitch of makeup on. Although I can tell she’s both tired and stressed, her face hasn’t aged a bit. Creamy white skin, crystal blue eyes, and dimples for days.

“Coop?” She blinks a few times as if she’s surprised to see me. Her mother must not have told her that I moved back, much like my own hadn’t bothered mentioning to me that Spencer would be in for a visit this weekend. She must have known. I don’t think either of our moms can take a shit without telling the other.

“Heya, Princess.” The old nickname rolls easily off my tongue.

Spencer looks down at her ratty clothes and her cheeks flush. “What’re you doing in Cedar Grove? I thought that you and Kristy had moved to Texas.”

“We did. Our divorce has been finalized for a few months.” Spencer’s blue eyes widen in shock. Did her mom not tell her that, either? “I moved back about two weeks ago,” I add, stuffing my hands into my pockets as I begin rocking back and forth. Spencer makes me feel like a nervous teenager. I never thought I’d ever feel uncomfortable around this girl. There was a time we’d known all there was to know about each other. But, since we broke up, every interaction feels awkward. Like we’re ignoring the huge fucking elephant in the room, because we are, and we’ve been doing it for almost fifteen damn years.

“Oh,” she gasps before clearing her throat. “I, ummm. I had no clue.” She swallows as her thumbnail moves to her mouth and she begins chewing. “I can’t believe my mom didn’t mention that. I mean, it’s kind of a big deal.” She huffs, blowing upward to push the hair out of her eyes.

“I assumed you already knew.”

Spencer’s head shakes slowly. “Wh-what happened?” she asks, fiddling with the bottom of her shirt.

The last thing I want to discuss with this woman is my ex-wife and our failed marriage. I shrug. “We just . . . we didn’t work out. Kristy wanted things I couldn’t give her.” Spence nods, but her face is screwed up in confusion. It’s as if she doesn’t understand a word that’s coming out of my mouth. “There was no sense in either of us being miserable. It was for the best,” I answer carefully, both wanting to make sure she knows that I’m not still hung up on my ex-wife and not wanting to come off as an uncaring asshole, either.

“Wow.” She gulps, staring at my face as if she’s waiting for more. I have no more to offer.

The truth is, that while I cared about Kristy, I never loved her. Not the way I should have. I guess she’s expecting me to be more upset, but all I felt the day I signed those papers was relief. I can’t exactly say that, so I opt for changing the subject.

“What about you? Last I heard you were still teaching women how to orgasm in NOLA.” I laugh, throwing that out there to try and lighten the mood. I hate it that she’s so nervous. But, my attempt at humor backfires.

Spencer’s face pales as a little voice calls from the back seat. “Hi, man. Hiii!”

That must be number three. The last time I saw him was at her father’s funeral. He was barely walking, and certainly not talking yet. It’s a lot harder to ignore when he’s calling for me.

Her eyes narrow to slits. “Don’t be a pig, Cooper. I loved my job.”

Well, this just got interesting. “Past tense?”

“The clinic I worked at is closing down, so the kids and I are moving in with Mom ’til I find a job and we sell our house.” Her voice is thick with emotion. She’s definitely not happy about being back here, and she doesn’t seem too thrilled with the fact that I’m here, either.

“Yet me outta here! Yet me out, man!” baby spawn yells from the back seat as his little fist pounds on the tinted glass. Spencer pretends she doesn’t notice.

“You gonna take the kid out or what?”

“I’m sorry?” Her hand goes to her chest in an unspoken “Are you talking to me?”

“The little one.” I dip my eyes toward the back seat. “You can’t tell me you don’t hear him yelling to get out.”

“I know it’s been a while, Coop, but I’m missing a vital piece of equipment to be addressed as man.” Her brows do a sexy little bounce as she dips her head toward the car in challenge. A smirk plays on her lips.

Shaking my head, I hold my hands palms out and slowly begin backing away. “Oh no. Sorry. I don’t do kids.” Especially not kids that the woman who was supposed to bear my own children had with other men.

Apparently, she finds this amusing. With a giggle, she mocks, “You don’t do children?” Spence raises her hands, making air quotes.

“I don’t.”

“Wow.” With that single word, all humor is wiped from her face. I’m truly fascinated by how quickly this woman is able to switch her emotions. I try not to stare in awe as she continues. “I’m not asking you to take him home or anything. He just wants you to get him out of the truck. He’s a two-year-old, Cooper . . . not a fucking viper.”

Well, this is going downhill real quick.

“I’m just not around kids much. They make me uncomfortable,” I say by way of explanation, hoping to calm her tits a little. The last thing I want is to piss her off, but I seem to have a knack for it.

Spencer’s mouth falls open in surprise. “Are you really not going to take that baby out of the car?” She is downright pissed, and this time, her anger is directed at me.

Fuck. I don’t remember her being so scary. She’s got those momma eyes down to a T, yet, somehow . . . on her, they are hot as hell. The term M.I.L.F. now makes all the sense in the world.

Spence throws her hands up in resignation as she tries to move around me. “Get out of my way so I can get him.”

My hand darts out, grabbing ahold of her upper arm. “Are you angry with me, Princess?” I ask, pulling her close. I find myself fighting the urge to smile. She would fucking murder me.

Spence growls with annoyance. “Fuckin’ right I am. You don’t come over here acting like my baby has a damn disease or something.” Her manicured finger is right in my face. I reach out, pinching it between my thumb and forefinger, and bring it to my lips, dropping a kiss on the tip before lowering her hand to her side. That earns me a glare, but she’s not unaffected. In fact, she’s stunned speechless. My heart is racing. I can feel it pulsing in my throat.

“Man! Hi, man. Take me out!”

“Fine, I’ll do it.”

Spencer’s sparkling blue eyes roll up in her head as she jerks her arm out of my grip and crosses them on her chest. “Just go home.” Her head shakes slightly and she huffs a disgusted breath. And fuck if that doesn’t make me want to prove to her that I’m not the loser she thinks I am. Her anger, I can handle. Her disappointment, I cannot.

She starts to walk around me again to open the door, but I stand in front of it, legs and arms spread wide, blocking her. “I said I’d do it.”

“You look like a five-year-old,” Spence snaps, backing away a few paces.

I open the truck door and the little booger smiles a big, cheesy grin. “Hi, man!”

“Hey, little guy,” I say with a smile. I can do this. I can hold her kid.

“You a fuck!”

Whoa! I jerk back in surprise, knocking my head on the doorframe.

“Shit!” Goddamnit. That fucking hurt.

“Shit!” the little potty mouth repeats.

“Don’t say that,” I whisper, hoping the she-devil behind me didn’t hear.

“Are you teaching my baby bad words?”

“I think your baby could teach me a few bad words,” I call back as I finish untangling his arms from the straps and pull him out. The way he looks so much like his momma takes me by surprise. Her smile. Her dimples. Her little button nose.

“What’re you talking about?”

“This kid just called me a fuck.” I make sure to mouth the last word as to not get myself into any more trouble. I hold the kid out to Spencer so she can take him, but he pushes away from her.

“Hole me, man! I yike you.”

Spencer’s cheeks redden like a ripe, juicy tomato. “He probably just said truck. Two-year-olds don’t always pronounce words correctly.”

“I not say shruck, Mommy. I say fuck!”

I smirk and cock my brow, daring her to tell me that I didn’t just hear what I know I heard. “Your baby just called me the F word.”

“Landonnnn!” Uh oh.

“Ma’am?” he says, coming around the truck with a fresh load of bags in his arms.

Spencer’s hand flies out, connecting with his shoulder.

Landon flinches at the same time that I hop back in surprise.

“How many times have I told you to watch your mouth around your baby brother? Huh?” Landon shrugs as she leans in closer. “He just called Cooper the F word!”

“Mommy, you mean! Not hit Yannon, Mommy. Dat not nice!”

“Shhhhh,” I whisper to the little dude in my arms. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you not to poke the bear?”

“Not helping, Cooper,” Satan grumbles without turning from her kid.

“Can I go now?” Landon mutters, still rubbing his arm.

“Go!”

I wait until the kid is out of sight before risking my life. Why I’m choosing to put my life on the line for the enemy, I have no fucking clue, but apparently I am going for the gusto. “I know I’m not a parent or anything, and I don’t even think I’d be a good one, but you think maybe you shouldn’t have hit him?”

Her head spins, and I half expect green vomit to shoot out of her mouth. “Did you just call me a shitty parent?”

I look around as if the person she’s talking to will just magically appear, because I know damned well that I did not just do that. “I didn’t say that.”

“No,” she says, ripping her baby from my arms. “You just said that you’d be a shit parent and even you wouldn’t hit your kid.”

Umm. What the hell is happening here? “I don’t think that’s what I said.”

Her big blue eyes well up. Oh shit. “You think this is easy, Cooper? Huh? You think you could do better?” Her eyes overflow as big, fat tears drip from her chin. “Guess where their perfect fathers are?”

I shrug, wishing I could take back what I said.

“Out . . . living their lives, because you know what, Coop? They don’t do children, either.”

Her other son, Lake, silently walks between us, giving me a “Now you’ve gone and done it” look while shaking his head to himself. He grabs the little one from Spencer’s arms. “Come on, Savage. Let’s go say hi to Gramma.”

“Otay, Yake. Bye, man!”

I lift my hand and wave, watching until they’ve made it inside before apologizing. “I’m really sorry, Spence. You’re right. I don’t know shit about raising kids. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Her face crumbles. “But, you’re right. I-I shouldn’t have hit him. He’s not handling the move well, and his father stood him up. He’s just been so ugly to me this last week, and he taught the baby to say fuck. I was just so embarrassed, and I took it out on him.”

She still does it. My heart clenches tightly in my chest as I listen to her ramble on, the way she always used to when she was upset. It’s crazy how little things like that stay with you.

Opening my arms, I whisper, “Come here, Princess.”

She shuffles forward until her chest is flush with mine then rests her forehead on my shoulder. Slowly, Spence snakes her arms around my waist as I do the same. I hold her while she cries it all out, stroking her back lightly with the tips of my fingers.

I look up to find her mother watching us from the front window, and when her eyes meet mine, she gives me a thumbs up.

It’s at this moment I realize that these old ladies are up to something. I’d be willing to bet that when I get to Momma’s mailbox . . . that son of a bitch is empty.