Can't Hurry Love
Chapter 17

Josh heard the bedroom door open, and he rushed down the hallway to stop Beth from walking on her sore ankle. He probably shouldn't have left her alone, but he'd wanted to surprise her by cooking for her and, he could admit to himself, to keep her here with him for as long as possible.

Her phone had been hopping with calls and texts, but he hadn't wanted to invade her privacy by looking at it.

His own had rung three times. Once from Ellen and twice from that Chicago number he didn't recognize. And even though he'd told himself he'd answer the next time Ellen called; he'd ignored them all.

He didn't want anything spoiling this evening with Beth.

Having already decided that he'd confess his past soon, he wanted to just enjoy some time with her. Time that wasn't clouded by his hang-ups or tainted by his history.

The door opened fully as she limped out and spotted him.

Josh's heart clenched at the sight of her.

She was wearing his black robe, and he was shocked at the slam of desire he felt seeing her in it. It swamped her, but she still looked incredible. Beth Carroway was the only woman he'd ever known who could make a men's robe look sexy. Her hair was loose around her shoulders in a tumble of platinum curls.

She was stunning. Breathtaking. And, if he managed to get his shit together properly, his.

She looked so unsure of herself, so vulnerable. And he knew it was his fault. The stupid back and forth all year, the pulling her closer then pushing her away it had made her uncertain of his feelings. Probably half-scared that he'd want rid of her. Fixing that was an absolute priority.

He walked forward until they were inches apart. "Hey," he smiled, reaching out and fingering a stray curl.

He watched, fascinated as her eyes darkened with the action. That was another thing he loved about her-liked, he amended quickly to himself. She wore everything she was feeling right there on her face for the world to see. "Hey," she squeaked, and his felt his grin widen as her cheeks darkened.

"You hungry?" he asked casually.

"Oh... um..." There was still that uncertainty in her eyes.

He leaned down and brushed his lips softly against hers. And then, because that wasn't enough to even begin to satisfy him, he deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her against him. When he finally let her up for air, she was gasping, her eyes glazed with desire.

Josh was torn between checking on her foot and feeding her... and dragging her back into the bedroom to finish was he'd just started.

Just then the smoke alarm went off, making the decision for him. He swore under his breath and darted back into the kitchen to turn off the oven.

After opening the window to release some of the smoke filling the room, he went back to help Beth. "Sorry about that," he said sheepishly. "I made a lasagna, but I'm not sure how edible it's going to be." Beth giggled. "If it tastes as good as it smells, I'd rather order pizza," she said, and he loved that her nervousness seemed to have disappeared.

"Pizza, it is." He bent and swept her into his arms, carrying her back to the couch. It felt incredible to finally be like this with her. And incredibly right.

"Your phone's been going a little crazy," he said, reaching over and grabbing her purse to hand to her. "Maybe you should let whoever it is know that you're alive, while I grab you a glass of wine. Red ok?"

A flicker of uncertainty darkened her eyes again, but she nodded and reached inside her purse to take her phone out. He left her to her messaging while he went into the kitchen to grab the bottle of merlot he'd opened and two glasses. When he came back into the room, she was typing furiously, a slight frown on her brow.

"Everything good?" he asked as casually as he could.

Truthfully, he was worried that she was having second thoughts. Maybe she'd decided that she wanted to go speed dating after all, that he wasn't worth the drama. That her Prince Charming was sitting in the community hall, just waiting for his fifteen minutes to sweep her off her feet.

"Yeah." She dropped her phone in her lap and took the glass he held out. "Paige was wondering why I'd flaked on tonight's event. Grayson couldn't figure out how to defrost one of my not burnt lasagnas..." She grinned. "...and Zoe was making sure I hadn't been murdered."

"So, does Paige want you over there?" he asked, trying not to sound too disappointed. He didn't want to make her feel bad if she had to leave. He sat in the armchair across from the couch, not wanting to crowd her.

"No, according to her, all the good ones were snapped up in the first fifteen-minute stint. But she felt it only right to tell me that Gerald Linney and John the actuary specifically asked about where I was." She darted a glance at him before staring furiously into her glass. "But if you want me to go, I can. I mean I could-"

"Beth, I don't want you going anywhere," he said simply but sincerely.

He couldn't blame her for her uncertainty, but he wasn't ready to have the open, honest conversation they needed to have. Not right now. Tonight, he just wanted to be in the moment with her.

"Ok," she said shyly but happily enough. She took a sip of her wine before tossing him her phone. "But you promised to feed me." She picked up the remote as if she'd lived here her whole life. And he loved how it felt. "The pizza place is on speed dial. And I'm picking the movie."

Beth could feel her phone vibrating like all get out but she refused to look at her texts. Because she knew what they'd say. She knew the questions that her friends would be demanding answers for, and the truth was, she wouldn't have any

answers.

Coward that she was, she was afraid to ask them.

She had picked a romantic comedy that Josh had laughingly complained about, and they'd sat here watching it, eating pizza, acting for all the world like a couple.

But they weren't a couple, were they?

Okay, he hadn't kicked her out, which had been her biggest fear. In fact, he'd kissed the living daylights out of her then asked her to stay. And he'd cooked, bless his heart. Or tried to. Wasn't that a good sign?

She didn't know for sure, and she was too scared to ask. She didn't want to come across as a complete stage- five clinger and scare him off. But this was confusing by anyone's standards. Maybe she was reading too much into things, but there was something different about Josh today.

And it wasn't just the incredible sex.

It felt as though he'd decided to stop pushing her away.

But she didn't know why he'd stopped. Or even if he'd really stopped. She didn't even know why he'd been doing it in the first place.

They'd gone through a full bottle of wine too, so unless he was planning on having her walk back to the ranch, did that mean he was expecting her to stay?

Her phone buzzed again, and she subtly hid it under the cushion beside her.

She'd sent a group text to Zoe, Brooke, Paige, and Jenna-all of whom had been calling and texting her while she'd been crossing every boundary known to humankind with Josh in the bedroom.

Can't talk. Won't make speed dating. At Josh's. We're on a date? Maybe. I think we are. What the heck I slept with him. Gotta go! B X.

Not her finest moment, but she'd been busting to tell them that it had finally happened. Every one of them knew she'd been carrying a torch, like an Olympic-sized, never- dying torch for Josh Larson for over a year now. And she'd finally won gold.

In hindsight, she probably should have waited to have some sort of clarifying conversation with him before she went telling people about them.

But it was too late now. The cat was out of the bag.

"I can't believe you insisted on this movie, and you're not even concentrating on it."

Josh's voice interrupted her wandering thoughts, and she turned to see him scowling at her, his eyes twinkling.

He was so gorgeous. It still took her by surprise sometimes.

"I am concentrating on it," she argued feebly.

"No, you're not," he answered. "That mind of yours is going a mile a minute. So why don't you tell me what you're thinking?"

Oh crap.

Should she tell him? It felt a little early to lift the lid on all her crazy.

On the other hand, she was sitting here in his robe, worrying that she'd be thrown out into the night with no way home, so it was probably best to just ask him outright what he wanted to do.

But she just couldn't bring herself to do the whole "what are we?" thing. It was too embarrassing and way too soon. She knew that.

"Beth." He pressed pause on the movie then turned to face her, lifting one of her hands and rubbing her pulse which was growing more erratic with every pass of his thumb. "What's on your mind?"

She had to ask. She had to know. Even if he put her on the first train to Crazy Town.

Steeling herself for eviction from his apartment and his life, she took a deep breath and looked up to meet his eyes. He was so close she could see the glint of silver in them, smell that masculine scent that made her wild. But she needed to stay focused.

"I'm just confused," she admitted. "Happy, but confused. I didn't think you wanted this. Me."

God, this was embarrassing. She could feel the heat in her cheeks and just knew they were scarlet, so she dropped her gaze to their hands.

"But today you you're different. Like you do want me, and—and I don't know how long for. And-and I can't drive injured and with half a bottle of wine in me," she blurted. "So, if you're going to ask me to leave, then I'll need to call someone for a ride."

The silence was excruciating, and she refused to look at him until she felt his finger under her chin, lifting it.

He was smiling.

Smiling was good, right?

"I know we have a lot to talk about," he said. "I have a lot to explain. I will. I just wanted to take my time. Take this slow. And I'm sorry for how... confusing I've made things. But did you really think I'd kick you out in the middle of the night?" His laugh made her feel like an idiot, and she shrugged to try to cover her embarrassment.

"How's your foot?" he asked suddenly, surprising her with the change of topic.

"It's a little sore, but-"

"So maybe you should stay off it a little longer."

She watched fascinated and thrilled by the flare of heat in his eyes.

"Did I say a little sore?" She grinned. "It's agonizing. I should definitely rest it mo—"

He didn't give her a chance to finish; just picked her up and carried her back through to the bedroom, kicking the door shut behind him.