Chasing My Rejected Luna
Chapter 54

TEGAN'S P.O.V

I rubbed my eyes in fear I was seeing things.

"Helena, is that you?" I asked, as my voice broke, tears starting to fall down my face. "It's me baby." She said as she rushed over to my side. Ezra stepping out of the way.

"But how?" I asked. Knowing my father wouldn't just let her leave, especially after not getting payment for my services with the contract.

Her eyes cut over to Ezra before connecting back with my own. I had so many questions but right now, I just wanted a hug.

I reached my arms up for her to come to me. Our bodies connecting in a tight embrace as I wept more. If it was one person, I needed the most right now, it was her. She had always been like a mom to me, the mom I never got the chance to have. Her being here right now means more than she knows. As much as I want to blame this all on Ezra, I know this wasn't his fault. I chose to leave, I chose to try and move on with Liam, and I also chose to move to his pack. Ezra may be an asshole but if it weren't for him showing up when it mattered the most Elias, and I would be long dead. I wouldn't tell him I was thankful; however, my fiery spirit and hardheaded ways could never allow that. But I was grateful for his timing and him showing up when we needed him the most. He is a lot of things, but a bad man was not one of them. I looked over to see him watching our son, giving Helena and I a moment but not wanting to leave.

"Thank you, Ezra." Was all I said. He may not interpret the meaning to the extent of my thanks but at least he got that much.

"For you, anything." He replied. I looked from him back to Helena.

"So, catch me up on everything." I said as I patted the space on the bed.

Helena took a seat and began explaining all that she has been doing since we parted ways a few months back.

"And my father?" I asked. Ezra's head turning slightly to listen in.

"He seems to be okay."

"Is he happy now that I am not there?"

"You cannot blame yourself for his unhappiness Tegan. He is a bitter man."

"But he hated me."

"He is also a hatful man, that will never change."

"But does he seem happier?"

"He seems more miserable that he has nobody to pin his misery onto."

Her words brought me little happiness. Of course, my father will always be a sore spot, but for some reason I yearn to see him happy. Something I have never witnessed myself. From what others say, he was the best man before I was born. Which brought me little comfort in knowing I was the issue.

"It was never you Tegan." He said grabbing my chin to look at her. "He lost his mate and when he lost his mate, he lost his way. That is not your fault. You have to know that."

"Then why treat me the way he did?"

"Because my beautiful child, you remind him of her. Which reminds him of his loss. It was never actually you."

I want to believe her but we both know there is lies in the truth. I was trying to find the right words when a slight knock at the door had us look over. Erin, the kingdom pack doctor then walked in.

"I got here as fast as I could. How are you feeling?" She asked as she got closer to the bed, a chart in her hand.

"Like a million bucks." I replied sarcastically.

"Your surgery was a little over 3 hours ago. We don't want to get you up or moving for at least 6 hours. That however is for normal cesarean births. For you however under the circumstances of delivery we will see how you feel at the 6-hour mark and if all is well, we will go ahead and get you up and moving. The sooner you're up and moving, the sooner we can head home."

Home. It's such a strange and unfamiliar word to me, almost foreign. Nowhere feels like home to me. I don't ever want my son to feel like he doesn't have a home. So, I will return to the kingdom for him. That way he will always have a place to call his home. For me, I am not sure it will ever feel like my home. I haven't ever felt at home in my life, so truthfully the meaning of home holds no meaning to me. My son deserves better. He deserves to not only feel at home but know it's his home. I know Ezra will provide that for him. I see the look in his eyes as he stares down at Elias, he loves him.

I thought I once saw that love in his eyes for me too. Which is why it was so easy to let my guard down. But then he pulled the rug out from under me. I was getting used to being someone he loved. I still see that same affection twinkling in his eyes from time to time, but I refuse to allow myself to fall for that again.

"When can we hold Elias?" I asked not really caring about anything else. I wanted to feel his skin against my own.

She walked over to the incubator and examined him before looking at his chart then at all the machines.

"He is doing very well; I think some skin to skin will do him some good. We want to go slowly so only one person can hold him for about 15 minutes. At that point we will see how he is doing out of the incubator. If he does well, we can trade off for an additional 15 minutes. We need to be mindful that he was born 3 weeks early and was not ready to be brought into the world. So, with holding him we will want to do it little spurts at

a time. If he does well with this, then we can do hands on every 2 hours during

his tube feedings. With that being said, who would like to go first?" She asked as she

opened the incubator, rearranging all of the tubing so that moving him around is easier.

Ezra looked over at me as I looked at him.

"Tegan will." He said as he stepped aside.

Doctor Erin picked his small frame up before walking over to my bed, the tubing reaching perfectly.

"Pull your gown down, skin to skin is the best. It helps with his temperature and it's also good for bonding."

I did what was asked as she placed him on my chest. My entire

world fell into place the moment he looked up at me. Hid beautiful green eyes searching my own.

"He is perfect. Just like you." Ezra said as Elias nestled into my chest.