Divorced! Now what?
Chapter 138

Bethany POV

Thomas's home is peaceful; when I woke, I had forgotten where I was until I heard the voices floating from downstairs. I showered, washed off the smell of disinfectant, washed my hair, and once dressed in clean clothes, I was thankful for bringing an overnight bag for sports day, which felt so long ago. I headed down, following the sounds of voices.

Guided by the hushed voices, I was drawn to Theo, my anchor in this storm of emotions. The depth of my feelings for him was a mystery, a blend of gratitude for his unwavering support during my darkest times and a burgeoning desire for something more. All I knew was that I yearned to be in his arms, to feel his warmth and safety.

He pulled me in close, and I snuggled into my safe place. He was warm and smelt like a baby. He must have been holding Mini Bob, and then he made me tingle below. With all this death and loss, I was happy that I was there to bring Mini Bob into the world, and I hoped one day, for one of my own, I would prove to myself that I am not like my mother, that I can give the right kind of love.

I was a little jealous of Thomas, as crazy as that sounds, considering the biases people have when they hear of the relationship he is living, but it works, and that is all I cared about. You can see and feel their love for each other, and the house is warm. Yeah, he might have outside problems with people's judgment, but the moment you walk into his home, you can't help but feel the warmth and welcome he offers when he lets you in, and he does not let many in, that is not already part of his inner circle of friends. I was content with the hum of voices as Theo pulled me closer and drew little circles on my shoulder. When Dad and Pam walked in, I stiffened when I saw her. I felt she had abandoned me at the door; I know when Scott's team is there, they come forward and let me know they have my back. There was none when Pam dropped me off, and I felt she had something to do with that, making me uneasy.

'Bethany... Dad summoned me to follow him to Thomas's office, and I knew then that something more was happening. He pulled me close to him and led me to the office, closing the door behind him. He stood and held me tight for a bit and sighed. 'We have to talk. Let us take a seat,' he said, guiding me to a chair and pushing me to sit. I waited.

'If you give Pam a chance, she would explain better than me.

'Explain what, Dad? How was I taken straight after she dropped me off? Where was Scott's team?' I whined back at him, and I was hurting inside more than I realized to whine like that.

'That is why I have you here, and it is not to leave this room until it is properly announced, but then I don't know if Pam's part of it will ever be released to the media.

'Get to the point, Dad.' I wanted short, not drawn-out explanations.

'Pam is an uncovered FBI agent investigating police corruption, and she has had her team watching you since the first accident. Her team, whom she has already yelled at and reported to her boss, failed you, not Scott's team or Pam herself. She said her team nodded to her when she dropped you off, and if she had not looked in her rearview mirror, turned around, and tailed the van, we would have no idea where you had gone. She tried to get to you in time, but the traffic made it hard, and her team was taking a break, not even paying attention till it was too late. She is distraught that you got taken, and nothing you can say will hurt her more than she is hurting herself; her team let her down, and as an officer, that is the worst kind of hurt. It is like you in the theater, and having one of the assistants make an error nearly cost you your patient! Dad was driving this hard, defending her, and I felt there was more at stake here than me accepting that Pam did her best. 'So, she is not at fault because she had a team there? She drove away before I even got inside; none of you would have done that; where do we draw a line, Dad? Sure, no one knew a guy was inside waiting, and the doorman was none the wiser, and I can go on with all the wrong things!

'Stop. I get it. It was a mixture of things, not just Pam. Does that mean you do not hold her responsible for failure to protect you?' He sounded hopeful.

'Dad, you sound like you do not know me at all. Am I bitter that I was retaken? Yes. Am I blaming Pam? No, she was only one piece of the whole collapse. I am sure the kidnappers would find a weakness sooner or later if all were in place. You know or should know I never hold grudges; life is too short to blame on anyone's shoulders, but the person who wanted me dead, and is Bret, is gone now along with Mum and Cynthia. Am I safe now? I don't know; any of those linked to those three could want to get to me for losing their lucrative income.'

'There are more books to decode; they have a guy who is starting to understand the coding you have; can you teach him so you do not need to decode it yourself?'

'Yeah, it is easy to do. It is something Cynthia and I made up years ago when we had a school project, and someone kept stealing our material, so we made a code by changing the alphabet around. Like an A is E, little things that make no sense, as the often used letters are the ones we changed, not the whole alphabet. It is easy enough to read once you have the code. We would change the letters around now and then, but once you know what you are looking at, you can easily see when it changes! 'Now the tricky question: I like Pam, and she has asked if we could be a couple; I said it all depended on you if you would accept her as your stepmother if it ever reached that far!

'Do you feel you can trust again, Dad? Mum did a big number on you. Are you ready to have that trust again? Are you ready to risk giving your heart to another woman?' I had to be sure that Dad was ready.

'I am already on my way; I thought I had misjudged again when she failed you, and so much seemed to be against her. I hurt inside thinking she was not a good cop, but since she has explained it to me, I accept that a lot was out of her hands. He looked at me like he wanted me to say yes, but it was his life. If he stuffed it, it might break his heart completely, and I could only be there to pick up the pieces like he had been there for me.

'Dad, this is your life, and I accept whatever or whoever you want in your life. You have my full support, and though she had valid excuses for failing me, she will need to start cheering for my team a little louder on Sundays! I joked. Dad pulled me into his arms and held onto me tightly.

'Thank you, sweetheart; you do not know how much your approval means to me. I am glad you have my back, too.' Dad understood my questioning and reasoning; I needed to know that having a bed partner had not clouded his judgment of the woman.