Enslaved By The Alpha
Chapter 82

~KANE~

f**k

me.

I couldn't get the damn girl out of my head. I kept replaying the look of shock and hurt on her face when I told her to never speak to Maya like that again. I knew that she was fighting for my benefit, saying things that no one else was willing to say to Maya. But still, it wasn't something I could sit back and let her do. Maya had just lost our baby. I know that Maya's words weren't the kindest, but she was hurting. The hurt was causing bitterness in her words towards me.

I know that it may have been hard for the girl to listen to after being by my side this entire time. She knew exactly what I had to go through without Maya. And she's been nothing but loving and kind towards me. I hate to admit it, but she's probably the reason why I was able to break free from Giselle. Her support had helped me plenty during that difficult period of my life.

She may not realize it, and it's probably because I've never told her, and I don't think I'll ever be able to now that Maya is back in my life.

But even after knowing all of this and being grateful for her, I couldn't sit back and let her make Maya feel bad. I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable and unhappy after everything she's already been through.

But speaking that way to the girl had left me feeling extremely angry and guilty about myself. She has been nothing but gentle towards me. She didn't deserve the way I spoke to her. I didn't know if I'd done the right thing. At that time, I was only trying to protect Maya's feelings; I didn't think that I would be hurting her in the process.

Now I felt like a complete a*s. The one person that has stood by my side since the first day she met me, I'd managed to hurt her. I knew that would have happened eventually. I always knew that I would hurt her. Anyone that was in my life that cared for me, I always ended up hurting them. She wasn't an exception, even though I wanted it to be that way.

I let the water fall over my body in the shower. I was trying to cool the fire within my veins that hadn't left since the moment I hurt her.

I finally had Maya back, but that apparently couldn't stop me from thinking about the girl. From caring for her, from hurting because I hurt her.

The sadness in her pretty eyes would haunt me for the rest of my f*****g life.

How did I make this better? How did I let this woman go? I had no choice but to make it happen. I had to find a way to forget about her. And I had an opportunity to make that happen yesterday. I could have told her that she was a burden to us, that it was better if she left. But I knew damn well that I could never get those words out of my mouth. Not when it was directed at her.

I slam my fist against the wall. This is all because of her. My feelings are in f*****g tangles because of her. And I have no f*****g clue why. Who was she to me? Why does she affect me so much?

I protected Maya today, just like I knew I should. But instead of feeling happy about my actions, I felt like a damn fool. I felt like I'd done the worse thing possible.

And the girl was no longer here. She'd left with Gabriella. I couldn't see her face, making things harder for me. I thought that not seeing her would be the best thing for me, but I was wrong. It's anything but easy not having her in front of me. I knew that Gabriella would keep her safe, but for some reason, that wasn't enough for me. I wanted to make sure that she was safe on my own; I didn't want anyone else to have to do that but me. I was the only person I could trust when it came to her. She was so delicate that anyone would want to protect her at all costs.

But I did the opposite of that yesterday.

******g HELL!

What was wrong with me?

I've been praying for the day that I will find my mate again. Ever since she went missing, she was all I had on my mind. It was always her. I was desperate to have her back in my life. But I can't deny that the maid had my attention too. It had times that I put her above finding Maya, and I still felt guilty for it. Especially now that I knew Maya lost our baby while trying to escape from the witch.

A damn bloody witch that we still hadn't found up to now. Maya gave us all the information she could think of to help us find her, but it was barely anything. It wasn't enough to track the witch down.

This is what I should be thinking about. Ways that I could catch that witch and make her pay for everything she's done to my mate and our baby. She had to f*****g pay.

But even though I knew this, my mind kept going back to the girl, replaying the look on her face, over and over again.

Why did I let her get under my skin? Why did I let things get so far between the two of us that I craved her presence when she was no longer around me? "Kane?" Maya calls.

It's a reminder that I needed to get my s**t together, at least for her. No one else matters to me but her. I had to stop getting distracted at a time like this.

"You've been in there for a while!" She shouts. "Is something wrong?"

I stop the shower and wrap myself with a towel. "No," I tell her as I exit it. "Everything's fine."

I had to stay here until my people had rebuilt our home from scratch. There wasn't much left of it. This would give Maya time to spend with her family as well. I knew that both sides missed each other. I wouldn't want to separate them at a time like this. Her family already didn't like me too much. I didn't want to give them a reason to dislike me even more.

"I wanted to thank you for standing up for me yesterdag." She says as she looks at me.

Her eyes traveled down my body, and they did nothing for me. Usually, when she does something like that, I'm dying to touch her. To get closer to her. To eat her f*****g alive.

But I felt none of those intense emotions right now.

I blame it on the girl. She entered my life, and now everything felt upside down.

"You don't have to thank me, Maya," I respond. "From now on, you're the only person that matters to me. I'll always put you above everyone else. I won't let anyone mistreat you, not even me."

She smiles and hugs me, "thank you."

I wrap my arms around her despite the voice screaming in my head not to do it. "I know that this may be too early for me to ask this question, but it's been on my mind for a while," I say. "Do you think you can forgive me for all the times I've hurt you in the past? Can you forgive me for not being there for you when you needed me the most?"

She goes still in my arms, and I can tell that she isn't sure yet.

"You don't need to answer me right away," I assure her. "Take your time. I'm not going to rush you."

"Thank you," she whispers. "I need some time to rethink everything. I'll give you my answer eventually. For now, continue to hold me. I need this."

Why does holding my mate feel so wrong to me? This used to be the best feeling in the damn world. And now it felt like the worst.

What had changed? I should be holding onto her as tightly as our bodies would let me. I shouldn't be this hesitant for something so simple.

There is a knock on the door, and I'm grateful for the interruption. I didn't think I'd ever be this happy to not hug my mate.

I throw a shirt over my head and rush to open the door.

"What were you two love birds up to?" Lucy teases us.

Maya laughs, "nothing different from what you and Austin are often doing."

Lucy blushes, "I came to ask you something. I want your opinion before I go ahead with something."

"And what is that?" Maya asks her.

"Well, I know that you and Giselle's maid aren't exactly on the best terms after yesterday, but we wanted to invite her to the party tomorrow. She's staying with Gabriella; it will look bad if we send an invitation for Gabriella and Arthur but not for her. I just wanted to make sure that it wouldn't be uncomfortable for either one of you."

Before Maya could respond, I answered for her, "she isn't a threat to us. Yesterday was just a big misunderstanding. I'm sure she won't do anything like that again. You can invite her."

I wanted to see her. I was almost desperate to see her again. I know that it was wrong, but my desperation got the best of me.

Lucy smiles, "that's wonderful. And Maya, I know that you haven't exactly gotten a chance to know her properly. I think you might like her. Just give her a chance and get to know her better." Maya doesn't respond, but I can tell from her expression that she doesn't believe Lucy. She doesn't like her at all. I don't think I've ever seen Maya dislike someone this much before. Things are awkward between us; she isn't happy that I answered Lucy before she could. I wasn't thinking straight.

When will I ever learn?