Heart Of A Lycan King
Chapter 8

AIDEN.

I paced the hospital hallway with my hands clasped behind me. The place was quiet, save for the beeping sound coming from the room opposite me. The room my mate laid unconscious in.

Just what have I done? I wondered, as I sat on one of the waiting chairs, slumping back and covering my face with my hand. I had difficulty swallowing and breathing. Nothing made sense.

How would anything make sense when I wasn’t sure the state she was in? I didn’t call anyone, but of course, Kane kept calling till I picked up and I told him where I was. Where we were.

I didn’t know what to do. I had no idea what to do. I was scared, shocked, alarmed, and extremely worried. I didn’t know how to react to something like that because I had never experienced anything like it. Seeing Nala like that, seeing her faint in my arms nearly drove me insane.

I had almost lost it. Almost. But I had to remain sane to get her to safety. The whole drive I felt so hollow, so alone as my whole life, my reason for existing, was unconscious in the back of my car. She was my whole life since the moment I saw her, and now I might lose her.

My guts wrenched. My lungs stung. My heart was pounding so loudly.

‘I told you to take things easy,’ Leo snarled. ‘I warned you to be gentle with her. But what? You had to flare up and let your emotions, your anger, get the better of you!’ he snapped.

I didn’t reply. I had nothing to say. I didn’t know what to say precisely. All I kept seeing was the look in her eyes. The fear which slashed through my soul, and the anguish that ate at my heart before she fainted.

She was so terrified of me that she didn’t want me near her even when it was obvious she was having a panic attack.

‘What are you going to do?’ Leo asked. This time he sounded a bit calmer. ‘How are you going to fix the mess you created?’

“For goddess sake! Can you not let me be? Can you not let me handle one thing at a time?” I snapped irritatedly.

‘We wouldn’t have been in this situation if you would have just let me take care of her! All you needed to do was to let me take over!’

“Shut up!” I growled. “Just shut up.”

‘Make me!’ he snapped.

I didn’t reply because the door to Nala’s room was pushed open and the doctor strolled out, a nurse trailing behind her. The nurse stopped, bowed before me, then walked away.

“How is she?” I asked as I raced towards the doctor. The thudding in my heart is ten times stronger than it had been moments before.

Doctor Phillison sighed. Her hands tucked in the pockets of her white hospital gown. Her curly hair accentuated her olive skin. Almost everyone had the same skin tone in the capital and the surrounding packs as well. Doctor Phillis, as everyone called her, and I were friends. Kane, Phil, and I grew up together, attended school together and are still friends .

At one point, our parents thought we would get married. While I was a Lycan, Phil was a wolf. Her father is part of the royal council, and he owns the largest hospital in the capital.

“Where did you find her, Your Eminence?”

“No need for the use of the title, Phil. Tell me how she is,” I rushed. I could feel Leo pacing in my head. I could also feel his agitation and his fear.

“Come to my office with me,” she simply said and began walking away.

“Can’t I see her before we leave?” I said, sounding like a lost puppy.

“You and I need to talk first,” she said, her tone indicating finality.

I sighed. I stared at the door to Nala’s room for a few seconds before I reluctantly trailed behind Phil.

People bowed as we walked past them, and I simply waved my hand every time they did. I wish they would stop. I was slowly becoming agitated with the attention. And my mind was not at ease.

We stepped into Phil’s office, and I waited impatiently as she removed her gown and settled in her seat. The walls were painted white and matched the tiled floor. Unlike the smell of antiseptic that filled the hallway, Phil’s office had the strong smell of coffee, which caused a loud growl in my stomach, reminding me I had not eaten for a while now.

“Have a seat.” She gestured to the chairs beside me.

I shook my head. “Just tell me how she is first.”

“Where did you find her?” She asked again.

“She’s my mate,” I said, almost desperately. “That woman in there is my mate, Phil.”

Her mouth formed an O before she clamped it shut. The shock on her face was evident as she tried to process what I had just said.

“Your…your mate? Are you sure?” she finally spoke.

“Can you just tell me how she is?” I snapped. I had no patience for questions. I needed answers, not more questions.

“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “She’s stable now. But…”

“But what?” I interrupted as I held my breath. My nerves made my palms clammy from sweat. “What is going on, Phil?”

“Did you hit her?” she questioned, keeping her eyes fixed on me. “I know it’s very unlike you to do that. However, I’m asking so I can understand the situation better.”

I could only shake my head. Somehow, I couldn’t speak. It was as if a hot iron rod had been rammed down my throat, making it impossible to swallow or breath.

“It is quite obvious that she has been physically abused. I don’t know how much she has endured, but the scars on her body aren’t healing. I’m guessing some of them were made with silver. And perhaps, the rest were inflicted on her before she could shift,” Phil began.

The room began to spin, and I had to hold onto one of the chairs to steady myself.

“She’s also terribly malnourished. May I know what happened to her? From the looks of it, it seems like she had a panic attack. And from your information about the incident in the car, I also believe that she suffers from severe PTSD and the panic attack was a result of that,” she continued.

I had to sit down, else, I’d topple over and fall. That wouldn’t do any good for anyone. I was breathing heavily as I answered.

“I guess so. She was hyperventilating and didn’t want me to touch her. I may have been the reason for that, but I do not know exactly what I did to cause it,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Well, she’s asleep now. But I would suggest she stays here for several days. I would also suggest you have her see one of the therapists around so she can be helped. Those scars on her body looked terrible! I’m so sorry you have to hear this from me, but Aiden, she’s been terribly abused by someone. Someone who is very, very sick.”

For a moment, as I listened to her talk, I played with the idea of bolting up and driving back to that damned pack and having every single one of them pay. However, they aren’t my priority right now and I would rather not waste my time on garbage like them.

When the right time comes, I’ll have them pay ten times more.

“So…how…what…”

“Calm down,” Phil chuckled a bit. “I know how this must be affecting you, but you have to calm down. We don’t know the extent of the abuse, and so, do not really know what might trigger her. In that case, we have to be careful with our actions. We have to thread carefully around her so we don’t scare her. If you actually did something to trigger the state she is in now, then I suggest you give her some space and…”

“Hell no!” I snapped as I stood up. “I will not be leaving her side! She needs me. I have to be with her.”

“But you are the king. Who would handle your kingly duties as you sit by your mate? Besides, I was not saying you shouldn’t be with her. I was advising that if you really did do something to trigger her, then it would be best if you don’t stay around her that much right now,” she explained.

“Can I go see her now?” I asked. I was slowly becoming restless with each passing second of not seeing her. Of not being in her presence. It is killing me. Driving me insane.

“Sure. Make sure to notify me once she wakes up,” she said.

I was already on my way out when she spoke, so I simply waved my hand and stepped out of the room.

My phone buzzed at the same time. I slipped my hand into the pocket of my pants and pulled out my phone and checked the caller ID.

It was Lacie. My cousin. I sighed, the idea of ignoring her running through my mind. But that won’t make her stop. She’ll keep calling till I pick up.

“He…”

“You found your mate?” The loud shrill of her voice filled my ears, and I winced.

Kane that blabbermouth! I gritted.

“Good afternoon to you too, Lace,” I tried mimicking her voice.

“I am too happy right now to worry over the tone you just talked to me with. Now, answer my question. I heard you found your mate, is that true?”

“You can ask the blabbermouth who told you about it,” I snickered.

“Oh come on! Stop being a brute. Just answer the question. Is it true?”

“Yes,” I replied, slipping my left hand into my pocket as I stopped before the door to Nala’s room. “And I messed up the very first day we met.”

“I can come to the hospital with Kane. He’ll be leaving soon. I can stay with her wh…”

“No! Don’t. Stay at home!” I said quickly.

“But why? I want to see her. I want to help.”

“Look, Lace, I need to go right now. I’ll call you when I’m done. And don’t you dare say a word about this to anyone – especially not my mother!” I ended the call without waiting for her to say anything more.

Now, as I stood by the door, I was actually nervous. What if she’s still scared of me? What if she doesn’t want to see me again? What if she gets another attack? What if…

‘Enough with the what ifs and step in already! Or so help me goddesses, I am taking over right now!’ Leo growled.

I ignored him, steadied the rhythm of my heartbeat and stepped into the room.

I took small steps towards her, careful not to make a sound that would wake her or scare her.

I stood beside her, staring down at her. She looks so…frail. So broken. I can’t begin to imagine what she must have gone through. What she must have endured. What she still endures.

I slumped on the single chair kept beside her and took her hand that had no drip in mine. Her hand was cold, and small as well.

Her eyelashes were light, only a shade darker than her hair. Her lips, those soft, lush, all-your-dreams-come-true lips were parted, begging to be kissed. To be touched. I wanted so badly to touch her. I wanted so badly to feel her. To press her body on mine and assure her that things are going to be okay. That I’d always be there for her.

I brought her hand to my lips and placed a light k**s on it, my eyes trailing to her exposed neck. Now that she was wearing the hospital gown, I could see more of her skin. More of her scares. Since the gown wasn’t lengthy, it showed the scars on her legs and arms. The ones on her nape, and I was sure there were more underneath the gown.

Just how can people be this cruel?

‘We’ll make everyone responsible pay, won’t we?’ Leo growled.

“Everyone of them. Every single one,” I promised, balling my free hand into a tight fist, while the other still gently held hers.

‘Do you think she’ll be okay? Will she want us?’ Leo asked, his voice a light whisper.

“I don’t know Leo,” I replied truthfully. “I just don’t know.”

‘I can’t feel her wolf. She’s…distant. Like hidden in a shell,” Leo said in a panicked voice.

“It is obvious. She may be hiding from us. With time, we’ll get them, Leo. With patience.”

Her hand twitched in mine, and I quickly let it go, afraid that I may scare her when she feels her hand in mine.

Her eyes fluttered before she adjusted them to the light in the room, which was dim. Soon she began looking around slightly confused, taking in her surroundings, before her eyes finally rested on mine.

And when our eyes locked, I lost it all, swimming in the swirls of her beautiful eyes, and allowing her scent to envelop me.

---

NATASHA.

In all the long days and weeks I had spent in pain at the pack house, I hadn’t fainted. In all the long, dreadfully frightening weeks and months which had accompanied my life, I had never fainted. Of all the things I had ever wished for, hoped for, prayed for during the past years, it had been for someone to want me. To care for me. To accept me.

Someone to call mine.

Yet, when someone had done exactly that, I had fainted.

I came round thinking all of that, in a mad and bewildering jumble of confusion, to find myself lying on a hospital bed, with his dark gaze penetrating through my soul.

“Are you alright?” he said anxiously, the moment he saw me open my eyes.

His figure was towering. Still too big, still too dark, too…

“I’m sorry,” he rasped out. “Seeing you that way was such a shock that I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t think before I acted after he said… that.” He stopped, swallowed tensely, then added. “Are you okay, Nala?”

I didn’t answer. My mind was too busy trying to grapple with the frightening fact that this man, this king wanted me. The knowledge was shattering, too much for me to take in. All my life, no one had ever wanted me. No one liked me. No one cared about me, save for my parents.

Now, after years of getting used to that life, after years of accepting that, someone suddenly appears. Someone who claims he wants me.

I had thought I would feel the same, but I didn’t. Of course I did feel the pull, as strongly as ever. But the fear in my soul was stopping me from experiencing other emotions. The fear that this man might turn out to be worse than Matteo, took away the feeling.

I had seen how violent he can be as well, and that seemed to have blocked the little ray of hope I had held onto for so long. The realization had my eyes fluttering to shut again.

“No.” His thick voice pleaded roughly. “Nala…don’t pass out again. Please. I’m not here to…”

His hand touched my shoulder, and my senses went haywire, crawling through my body like scattering spiders and flinging me into a whirling mad panic that jolted me into a sitting position to quickly thrust his hand away.

“Don’t touch me…” I gasped out in shuddering action. “I…I…please.”

I heard him curse under his breath as he moved back. I leaned against the headboard, wrapping my arms around my body.

“Here…” he pushed a glass of water at me. “Drink some of this,” he urged. “You look dreadful.”

He was leaning closer. Too close. And then I looked up, only to find his gaze pinned on me. Shock darkened eyes honing directly into my own, and for a moment, I felt myself sinking into those blackened depths again, as if drawn there. The pull was getting stronger each passing second.

Oh, Goddess. Confused, I wrenched my gaze away, outshine the glass aside so I could cover my face with a hand while I at least attempted to get a hold of myself. But when I shifted my gaze back at him, as though I had been asked to, the wretched look on his face made my heart squeeze.

I would never want anyone to get hurt on my behalf. I thought, as I reached out to take the glass of water.

“Thank you,” I said with a feigned smile. I didn’t know I was thirsty till I drank the water, embracing the calmness that followed afterwards. I gave him the glass back when I was done and said, “I’m okay now.”

He simply nodded, and sat back on the chair. He had his head down, as though he was ashamed of something.

I tried to reach out to Erin, but all I could feel was emptiness. Cold emptiness. She was back to her little shell, and I wondered what would make her come out.

“I’ll go get the doctor,” he suddenly announced, turning to leave.

“Did you bring me here?” I finally asked the one question that had been boggling my mind.

“Ar…yes,” he replied, looking everywhere but at me. “You…you…”

“No one has ever done that for me. No one ever really cared,” I murmured absentmindedly.

I watched as his breath hitched as he stared at me, causing wild tremors to run through my chest.

“Not even when you have those…those…”

“Panic attacks?” I offered.

“You know about it?” I asked.

“I do. I sneak into the Alpha’s office and study what I can on his computer. When I started noticing the symptoms, I googled it. So yeah, I do. I am surprised you helped me though. Like I said, no one ever did. But I never fainted till now.” I explained.

“We are mates, Nala. I would do anything for you,” he said, walking back to me. “Anything to make you happy. Anything to take away your pain.”

I looked up at him, trying to think if I could trust him. If I could let my guard down and accept him.

“I am sorry for what I did. I…I apologize for hurting you. It was never my intention, Nala.” He shifted, as though he would touch me and I flinched again. It was a small reaction, because I didn’t mean it, I didn’t want to. In all honesty, I wanted to touch him.

“I am so sorry.”

“Stop apologizing,” I feigned another fake smile. “You did nothing wrong. I did. I am the one at fault. Stop blaming yourself for something you had no control over. I have been told I have the ability to irk people. The cursed one knows nothing but pain.” I smiled, even though I wanted nothing more than to curl up and forget my surroundings and existence. Maybe enjoy laying in a good bed for once.

His gaze darkened more, taking me in. Embracing me with only his gaze. This time when he moved his hand tentatively towards me, I didn’t flinch. I didn’t move away. No, I wanted it. I wanted him to touch me.

“Ehm, Nala.” He extended his hand. “I just…can I…can I hold you?”

I just stared at him for a moment before I nodded. I slowly placed my hand in his. Such heat! Such strength! His calluses, his warmth, his scent, delighted me.

The contact had been a mistake. A big…really big mistake. Because I suddenly wanted to feel myself wrapped around him. I wanted him to touch me. To tell me everything is going to be okay. But I didn’t pull away. Not even when he slowly started bringing my knuckles to his lips. Not even when he kissed them. He lingered the k**s, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply. Perhaps, taking in my scent.

I shivered. And Erin stirred, enjoying the touch. Enjoying the feel of his hand on us.

“I am so sorry,” he kissed my knuckles again. And just as he was about to say more, the door was pushed open and two huge men, an elderly woman, and a lady stepped in.

“Oh please! Not now!” he muttered under his breath, tightening his hold on my hands.