Shackled (The Lord Series) by Carlos
371. Olivia - Spencer I

My heart is about to burst out of my chest, with how fast it beats. While my eyes see the little boy who is the spitting image of Tyson playing on the rug with toys, my brain is yet to catch up with what is happening. He looks at me, his eyes like Tyson's, full of recognition. My soul and body, my entire being, recognize the little boy as mine.

"Mommy, you're not in Heaven anymore?"

I crawl my way to him, not blinking, afraid that if I do so, he will disappear. My soul is telling me that the little boy is my son, but my brain keeps reminding me that Spencer is dead. "Spencer," someone wails. It is a moment later that I realize the sound came from me.

Spencer gets up from the rug, his little feet quickly taking him to me. I don't dare touch him, still afraid that it is a trick of my mind. "Papaw and Mamaw told you and Daddy are coming tonight, but I didn't believe them. Dead people live in another place. That's what Papaw told me." His little fingers press against my cheek. He is so warm. "Mommy, how was it in Heaven?"

I pull Spencer into my arms, my face burying into his neck. He smells like the day he was born. Tyson's arms wrap around us, his shoulders shaking with emotions.

My son. In my arms. Alive. How?

One by one, Mose, Jasper, Ansel, and Rueben kneel around us, embracing Tyson, Spencer, and me.

I still don't understand how Spencer can be alive, but I'll worry about it later. Right now, all I want to do is cry and laugh at the same time. Life has never felt so perfect.

"It was lonely without you," I finally reply to Spencer's question.

"This is why you returned?" he innocently asks.

"Yes, because I love you so very much," I whisper.

I try to stop the flow of my tears because it feels like I have been crying for a long time. The entire day has been too emotional. First, I began to realize that I might want the baby, then Angel tells me she is finally giving birth. Then after my nap, the guys told me they had a surprise for me, and they brought me to my grandparents' house. I thought they were dead or worse, wanted nothing to do with me anymore. And lastly, I found out my son, my little Spencer, is not dead. It takes me a few deep breaths to gain part of my composure and to stop crying. I don't want to scare Spencer. I'll have time to cry later, when I'm alone. Right now, I need to learn what happened.

"I am sure this is overwhelming for everyone, but please, have a seat," Grandpa Jon says.

The guys help me stand. Tyson tries to take Spencer away from me, but I refuse to let go of him. What if this is a dream, and I'll wake up the moment Spencer is away from me?

I sit on the sofa with Spencer in my lap. My grandparents sit on either side of me and my men across from us. Spencer spends several minutes examining my face. He even turns my head around several times. Tyson's eyes watch every movement Spencer makes. "You look younger in the photos Papaw and Mamaw showed me. Do dead people age?"

Rueben chuckles. "Some do. Have you ever seen a mummy?"

Spencer nods. "Once, on the TV. It gave me nightmares." He hugs me tight. "You are not like a mummy," he says, making everyone laugh, "you are pretty."

I kiss his forehead. "You're handsome as well." I rub his back. "He speaks so well for his age," I can't help but comment to my grandparents.

Grandpa Jon ruffles Spencer's short black hair. "He's very smart."

Spencer notices the necklace Tyson gave me. "A butterfly, like the one you have behind you ear."

My brow furrows because I don't remember having a tattoo or a birthmark behind my ear. Grandma Khloe, who is to my left, clears things for me. "It's your hellstar mark. It represents love, hope, and rebirth."

I remember the night in the rain, when I made love to all my bondeds. I felt a tingle behind my left ear but I made nothing of it.

Who would have thought that my hellstar mark would represent hope and love when I lived without them for so long?

Grandpa Jon's expression turns serious. "Spencer, go play with you toys and leave the adults to talk."

My hold on Spencer tightens. I don't want to ever let go of him.

"But I want to stay with Mommy and Daddy," Spencer pouts before jumping down from my arms and running to Tyson, who cradles our son to his chest, his eyes shining with tears. My body already misses Spencer's warmth. It takes all my self control to not snatch him from Tyson. I don't want to suffocate him even if that's what I want do. "Can I, Daddy?"

Tyson is torn between not letting go of Spencer and not angering my grandfather.

"Spencer," my grandfather says sternly.

"Yes, Papaw," Spencer says and gets down from Tyson's lap, who looks just as reluctant as me to let go of him. "I promise we won't leave," Tyson says. "We just need to talk some things out that will for sure bore you." Spencer nods. He leaves, his shoulders slump forward, dragging his feet after him. All I want to do is to hold him tight so he's never out of my sight.

When he leaves the living room, I stand, wanting to go after him. I'm scared that he will disappear, that something will happen to him.

Grandpa Jon wraps his fingers around my wrist. I sit back next to him. "There's a camera in his room. You can watch him while we talk," he says and gives me his phone.

I watch Spencer entering his room and looking at photos on his chest drawers. Are those photos of Tyson and me? "He died in my arms. How is it possible that he's alive?"

"Jason called us in the middle of the night and told us that you died in labor and that the baby was in critical condition in the NICU. We could take care of him or not. The only thing that he said was that you named the baby Spencer after he said the name of the hospital and then he hung up on us. We rushed to the hospital and we've been with Spencer since then," Grandma Khloe says.