The Lycan Series
The Lycan King’s Breeder Chapter 21

Avalyn's POV

I could try again...

Lydia assured me that it could still happen. We just had to try again.

"How many more times?" I asked unsurely.

I needed to know. I knew my voice could barely be heard, but I had to ask. But then, I regretted my question immediately, how the hell could she possibly know how many times their Lycan king had to have s*x with me before I could conceive? The memories of his touch flooded my mind, and the idea he would touch me again made my heart race -what the hell was my problem? Why couldn't I just stick with having one emotion? Lydia hesitated for a moment, "Well... it depends. But as many as it's needed."

The last few minutes after getting the news had been like riding on a rollercoaster. I was heartbroken and scared one moment, then filled with hope the next. I couldn't make any sense of the confusing feelings I'd been getting the past week. I was scared of Willow.

I was scared of what she would do to me if I couldn't conceive and give her a child. But then again the thoughts of Talon bedding me again... it sent an unimaginable wave of tingles straight to my core, making me clench my fists as a means to distract my inner thoughts.

There was something about that man that drew me in, I didn't know what it was about him, but there was something. Maybe it was because I lost my virginity to him... or maybe it was the way he was gentle, the way he took care of me, the way he ran his hands softly around my body -NO! I had to stop.

I had tried so hard not to think about that night, but found myself, more than once, late at night wanting to touch myself to the memories he and I had created. The only thing that had stopped me was the shame, and the voice that kept reminding me how dirty

was.

"Can I go back to my room?" I asked softly. I had a lot to think about. And one thing for certain was that I couldn't give up now, I had to stay hopeful that I could fulfill this for him -and myself.

Both Greg and Lydia were quiet for a moment before Lydia nodded. "Of course, honey, you can go."

Sliding out from the table, I steadied my feet on the ground as I waited for Greg. He held the door open for me and led me out of the room and back towards the palace building. He didn't utter a word, and I honestly didn't expect him to. I knew this wasn't the greatest news for him.

"I'm sorry..." I said, keeping my eyes lowered to the ground, unable to even look him in the eye. "I'm sorry that you have to deliver bad news to the Alpha and Luna. I didn't mean to be such a burden."

He stepped in front of me and his voice was calm as he said, "Stop it Avalyn, this is not your fault." He paused for a moment, then added, "just follow Lydia's orders and do your best. Now if you'll please excuse me, I need to return to the training field."

I looked at him with appreciation in my eyes as I nodded my head. I couldn't believe I was once frightened by this man. Though he appeared very intimidating and closed off, getting closer to him and knowing him better proved otherwise.

As we got to my room, he opened up the door for me and ushered me in. "I'll send Dawn down to you, in case you need anything," he said with a small smile.

"Thank you," I whispered. I watched him close the door to my room, and off he went, footsteps patting down the hallway.

I sat on the bed and tried to calm my nerves. This must have been the most confusing point of my life.

I was scared but deep down, I couldn't deny the fact that I wanted him to come to me. I wanted him to open that door and touch me again.

I had lived the past week with pain in my heart. I was missing him but even admitting that to myself felt like the greatest sin. He belonged to someone else and I feared what his mate would do to me if she found out what I was thinking about. Could werewolves read minds?

I had to ask Avalyn about this. Because sooner or later she would be coming to me and I had to find a way to guard my thoughts if there was even a slight chance that she could read my mind. If she could, I was certain she would kill me. They got me as a breeder, not as a concubine or mistress. I had to act my part of the bargain.

But then again what could I do when the King was so sweet to me? What could I do when my body craved him?

It couldn't just be about virginity. I had heard stories in a class of girls losing their virginity and then dating a different person a couple of weeks later. That proved that taking one's virginity didn't mean a woman got attached to a man. But he was different. He was gentle and he was amazing.

"Oh, Avalyn!" I cried out slapping my hands to my face as I fell flat on the bed.

Why was my life so difficult? Why couldn't my life just be simple and easy?

I never asked for riches or wealth or anything like that. I just wanted a life where I had a place to call my own and the people around me loved me.

Was that too much to ask? Was it wrong for me to want to be loved? Was it wrong for me to wish for a better easier and simpler life?

Above all, why couldn't I forget this man?

A few days passed and I found myself not wanting to do much. Greg, Lydia, and Dawn had all taken turns checking up on me and encouraged me to stay positive about the situation.

Dawn had told me about the library, and after much debate, I agreed to go with her. Thinking about her closing argument made me chuckle.

'Avalyn I will lift you off your ass and carry you there myself!

She could be quite persuasive, I had to admit. The laughter we shared when I told her I definitely didn't want her carrying me, did make me smile.

The library was the size of my whole high school and it was even grander than she had described. Being there really changed my mood. Dawn and I wandered the shelves for hours until I had selected a few books to read. The entire time, she made jokes about all the romance novels I selected, while I tried to convince her they were beautiful stories.

As the sun began to set in the distance, I enjoyed the cool breeze that was drifting through the open windows. It was a welcome relief, to have fresh air on my skin. I still longed for outside, but I had gotten used to Willow's rules.

As we returned to my room and Dawn left, thoughts of Talon wrapped around my heart like a veil of pleasure and mystery. I still didn't know about how he'd taken the news about me not being pregnant, but Greg had reassured me he wasn't angry. Part of me didn't know how much of that I believed -but I trusted Greg. That much was true.

As the fire built by Elizabeth and the maids crackled in the hearth, I curled under the fur pelt she had brought me, along with a warm cup of tea and one of my books. The fur on the pelt brushed against my bare leg as I sat comfortably in my black tank top and underwear.

I wasn't expecting anybody -and with dinner long over, I didn't have to leave the room -not that I wanted to anyway.

I held pride and prejudice in my hand and Mr. Darcy was waiting for me on the pages. The thoughts of my situation burdened me every day. All I wanted was a way to break free from my reality and disappear into a world of make-believe.

One where nobody would care if I was pregnant or not, one where my father loved me, one where I could actually graduate high school and go on to college -and maybe find a man as gentle as Talon.

The creaking noise of my door opening snapped me out of my thoughts. My eyes darted towards the entrance as a towering frame came into sight.

Talon.

My heart dropped into my stomach and the room suddenly seemed suffocating. I wasn't expecting him to come this soon. Then again, what if he came to punish me?