The Secret Island
CHAPTER 46: The Person I Have Become

Martin was looking at the New York City skyline from his condo's window. His heart was strangely empty. He didn't understand what was happening to him at this point in his life. His life was shamefully unfulfilled. The court case that he had to endure was resolved through legal means. But the process left scars on his heart. The wound that he thought was completely healed was reopened the second time, and more severe injuries were inflicted in the incidents that no one should know.

Throughout those horrible times, the only source of comfort he had was the memories of those two weeks with that girl. She used to be his girl.

Even though that was the case, her flawless angelic face was the one image he was trying to forget. But no matter how much he tried, he could not forget her. He couldn't let go of the memories. His thoughts drown in the memories we spent together. He wondered how she was. He assumed she would be happy without him. She should have a good life.

It was during this time of the year that he felt the hole in his heart. He was weak. Because it was the same period as the two weeks we spent together four years ago. It was a hectic time. But his memories reminded him that she had made him smile more times than he could count. No matter how much he missed her, he knew leaving her alone was the best gift he could give. She already had a good life without him.

He took a deep breath and sighed. He looked out the window of his luxurious condo one more time.

This year was the fourth year since we first met.

He didn't know if she still waited for him, definitely no, she must have her new love and a new life without him. She should be happier without him. A life with someone she loved-maybe with the same man he saw that day. His heart ached, but he knew Celine deserved to be with someone better than him. Celine deserved the best, and he couldn't give her that.

Martin walked back to his office within the condo. In the past few years, after he served his jail sentence, he only spent time alone and traded stocks. It was his only way to make a living. He didn't make new friends; all his old friends deserted him except Martin. Who wanted to be friends with a former criminal? Other than Joe, he talked to his therapist. His parents barely wanted to talk to him. They hadn't forgiven him for his sins, every bit of it. They were there in court and heard all the crimes he committed in his old job for the sake of money. They were there that day when he was put in a handcuff. He didn't blame them. No one wanted him anymore.

He was grateful for his therapist. He had talked to Gisele every week since he got out of jail two years ago. His recovery process was slow, but he got better. He even flew to see Celine at one point. Just trying his luck. But in the end, he was disappointed.

It was a big risk going to see her. She might not accept the person he had become. He might not see anyone on this trip to the island in Italy. But he didn't prepare to see her with someone else. He saw Celine with someone else in the place that should be his.

He kept his promise. He promised to go back to the island. He did. At least he knew she was fine. But seeing her with another man was too much for him to bare. They looked perfect together, walking side by side. And he was just a stranger. He once thought he wanted to give her the world. He wanted to give her everything he could. But looking back at himself, he had nothing to give, and he was not enough for her. He had no future, no admirable status in society, nothing but a criminal record, and deteriorating mental health. He was not good enough for Celine.

On that day, he walked away. Martin decided he wanted Celine to have a good future without him

He didn't dare to walk to her and say hi. He didn't have enough courage to look into her eyes. He thought he had come back too late. He shouldn't dare to get back into her life. He loved her too much. So, he let her go to have a better life. Martin hadn't told anyone about what happened to him in prison except his therapist. Memories full of horrors replayed time and again in his head, even in dreams. His nightmares returned. He didn't want to tell anyone because he didn't want to see the look of pity in their eyes. He didn't want to hear any word of comfort. He didn't want to be the target of sympathy. He didn't want to be weak.

Because of that, he kept it all to himself and refused to go out. Although Joe told him that everything that happened wasn't his fault, Martin still blamed himself. It might take time for him to go back to the social scenes again, but now he didn't want to see anyone.

A knock on the door woke him out of his reverie. Martin walked to the large oak door of the condo. This place was one of his assets. He was still lucky to still have the earning ability from trading and investment-at least the FBI unfroze his account.

He paused in front of the door. It must be Joe-he was the only one with his security password to the condo, and the doorman and security guards downstairs knew him well. Still, Martin was quite surprised his friend visited him without texting him first.

"Hello, buddy. What's up? Is there anything urgent?" He asked in a monotonous tone-the only tone he adopted in the past years.

His therapist said he tried to suppress his emotions. Another defense mechanism that he wanted to forget all the sorrow and pain. He couldn't take any more hurtful memory. "Martin, please don't get mad at me. I'm just trying to help you." Joe was visibly nervous. It was a strange sight because he was a confident man. "What's wrong, Joe?"

"I have to apologize for meddling in your business. But Martin, you must know that you can't live like this. And I can't take it to see you spending your life like this. You can get angry at me or hate me. But please know that I do this for you." Joe's troubled look could only create more questions. Then Joe turned to talk to someone behind him.

"Please come here...."

Hmm?

Martin's heart skipped a beat and his heart rate accelerated.

Impossible. How could it be? This is impossible.

Martin thought this was all a dream. Either that or a prank Joe was pulling on him.

Martin's mind went blank. Someone familiar walked out of one corner of the hall and stepped in front of him. She hadn't aged a day. Hypnotizing brown eyes, straight shoulder-length hair, and a youthful, angelic face that always takes his breath away.

"Celine..."