Twisting Her Fate
Chapter 145

The girls stop for cocktails first as it is too early to go to The Warehouse, it is no fun when it is too early and there is nearly no people.

This is the one thing that Lani can accept doing for the night and the only good thing about not having her wolf, is that she can feel the effects of alcohol after only a few drinks, but that is also a hard thing when she is hanging with a bunch of she wolves. She's feeling the effects after a couple and they're still stone cold sober. She usually moderates herself so she doesn't make too much of a fool of herself in front of the other girls, but not tonight. Tonight she wants to forget for once.

By the time they get back in the car and heading towards The Warehouse, Lani is swaying slightly in her seat. The alcohol is doing little to numb anything and she is just feeling worse than ever.

She is usually a happy, chatty drunk, not tonight, she is a miserable, near crying mess. She tries to hold herself better, to be strong, to keep the pain hidden, she is attempting to be a good and happy mother for her children, a loving daughter and sister. A contributing member of the group even though she cannot go out on missions and put herself into dangerous situations anymore.

She tries to be a good friend. She tries to be so many things, spreading herself so thinly when all she wants to do is to retreat into the safety of Connor's warm embrace, she wants her safe harbour back, but that is all done, he is for someone else. Every day she is strong. Every day she is everything that everyone else needs her to be. She trains harder than ever before, trying to make up for her obvious deficiency in the midst of so much strength. Not today, not on the anniversary.

Today she will drown in misery, she will punish herself for not being good enough.

Sierra looks sideways at Lani, slightly pursing her lips. Lani is a powerhouse in the group. Even without her wolf, Sierra has boundless admiration for the woman. Sierra is the newest to the group, so isn't as close as the others. It isn't that they haven't been welcoming, because she has never felt so included in her entire life, it is just that the time passed isn't as much, there aren't as many memories between her and the others.

Leilani knows everything about everyone, she will drop everything to help others, yet she is so closed off about herself, she asked Arlo about it and he opened his mouth, looking like he wanted to say something but eventually closed it again without saying a word, it is the only thing that he has not being completely forthcoming about.

Sierra has never seen it so bad. Leilani has glassy eyes, looking like she is on the brink of tears the whole afternoon. There is no smile present on Lani's beautiful face and it makes Sierra sad, but she is hesitant to mention it.

They don't talk about the fact that they have Leilani's fated mate locked up within the pack, supplying women to him, they don't talk about the father of the twins, very little is said about Leilani's strange setup, but Sierra is treated like family and has everything she could want, she learned long ago, not to push things.

She reaches out and places a hand on Leilani's shoulder.

Lani looks over at her friend, offering her a half smile.

"Why don't we try and find a man for Lani tonight?"

Lani's smile slips and tears fall silently. Sierra loses all confidence in her wild idea.

"A one night stand?"

Sierra's voice is so quiet, like she hates her own idea but still has to voice it. "A one night stand?"

Lani's voice is equally soft as she returns to staring out the window, remembering that intense one night stand with Connor that cemented him in her mind. The bright night is starting to cloud over, the stars and moon replaced by thick, dark rain clouds that are threatening to wash away the city streets.

Kelsey parks the SUV and they unload from the car. The wind has started to pick up and the threatening clouds look like they are on the verge of spilling. The icy chill is on the breeze. Lani wraps her arms around herself, trying to keep the chill of the night air out. She is nowhere near as hotblooded as she used to be, now she can feel the slightest chill right in her bones.

They walk to the door of the club and are let straight in. No one would ever not let four stunningly beautiful women in, even if the club is at full capacity. Which tonight, it is already at full capacity. They thread their way through the crowd. The music is so loud that it hurts Leilani's already aching head.

She used to like this type of thing. Used to be able to negotiate through a crowd and feel like a part for her, now it only closes in on her, trapping her in the midst of the writhing bodies.

Now it all just reminds her of what she was before and how different she is now. Maybe everyone goes through this when they become a parent. Maybe they all feel like that after they go through a life-changing event. Maybe they all go through that when they have a lost love that was so intense. But for her, she's got all three piled on top.

Now, instead of enjoying the scene, she only feels claustrophobic with all the hot and sweaty dancing bodies taking all the oxygen from her.

Leilani moves to the corner of the venue and Aubrey moves straight towards the bar to buy a large tray of shots. Lani cracks a smile when she sees Aubrey walking back with a tray that is so overloaded that the patrons are busy moving out of her way and watching, waiting for the inevitable moment that all the glasses fall.

Audrey manages to walk with a swish of the hips and makes the whole experience look easy. It is easy for her. She paid her way through nursing school doing such jobs. Her tricks with alcohol gained her a lot of extra tips.

She even does a spin for the waiting crowd, earning herself a cheer.

Lani is the first one to sink a shot without even waiting for the others.

Connor is still in his same position at the bar. He has lost count of how many glasses he has sunk, nothing is numbing the pain in his heart. His eyes just stare unfocused straight ahead as he clutches the glass, refusing to remove his hands. The bartender just fills up the same glass over and over again. Not even bothering with the ice anymore.

The only thing that has changed now is it has gone from not a single person to being a capacity crowd, but it doesn't make Connor feel any less lonely or any less hollow. He hears the singing, the joyous laughter. He can even hear passionate kissing behind him, but he just ignores it all. He might be the most unbelievably handsome man, but with the aura that surrounds him, no one dares to talk to him and the few that are brave enough, they get no response from the man. They are not sure if he doesn't respond because he doesn't want to or he just doesn't hear. Anyone can tell that he's so deep in his own mind that it could be possible for him not to hear.

For some reason, his attention is briefly drawn to a loud cheer that comes up from the crowd, but he looks quickly over and then looks away.

It doesn't matter what anyone is cheering about. Nothing will help him and nothing will cheer him up.

Aubrey leans against the table, lifting a shot glass of her own up to her lips.

"There is by far the hottest man I've ever seen sitting at the bar looking like his whole world is ended"

Kelsey laughs as she pulls out her phone.

"Just wait for me to set up record and say that again. I want to play it for Oscar".

Aubrey throws her hands up in the air. She might have a serious job and might be a serious person deep down, but she loves dramatics when she is around her friends.

"I will ring him right now and tell him he better shape up and look like that man over there"

Aubrey scratches her chin, suddenly deep in thought.

"Actually he looks vaguely familiar"

"He might be a model if you say he is so good looking that you nearly died"

"I didn't say I nearly died, but it could be possible he could distract me enough that I'd get hit by a few trucks"

Lani just sits in silence. Throwing back shot after shot, listening to the girl's banter. There couldn't be anyone better looking in the world than Connor, so she doesn't even bother to look. "Is that how you rate someone's looks by how many trucks you could get run over by without blinking?"

"Sounds like the perfect measure to me"