Wild West of the Heart
SIXTY SIX

SIX MONTHS EARLIER.

HOUSTON, TX.

His eyes seemed to have stars in them as he moved closer to him. Olamide scoffed lightly from his lips.

"Williams" Came a sublime whisper as his fingers briskly struck his before hovering again.

He swore he felt the electricity in his chest, this new feeling that seemed to haunt him each time he was close to his best friend. "I don't know what this is" Olamide whispered. "You don't have to" Will whispered, bringing his lips closer to his

ears.

Unlike Ola, Will had known he was gay since as early as preschool and he didn't really have much trouble or question mark over his sexuality. And up until that very moment, Ola thought he knew—

-he thought he had everything under control. He thought he'd never feel this type of way for a boy, and if not for Sarah, he'd have been oblivious to the idea of being bisexual. And after months of back and forth and will they, won't theys, they were here.

Every decision, every outcome led them to this very moment and Will wasn't afraid to hold his palm in his. "You don't have to think now" He said as he raised his hands and Ola looked to it.

"What's that?" He chuckled slightly at the pill between his fingers. "It's Opioid. All your worries, Ola. All of it would disappear" Williams whispered.

Ola laughed at the idea of that, and then he opened his lips, of course he trusted Williams and it was just a single pill. Truth was, the past weeks had been tough and he found himself spirally through this dark hole like he was a kid all over again.

He always battled with that. So if ever he saw the chance, he thought, to not have to subject himself to those overwhelming emotions, he'd take it. The pill melted on his tongue before Williams inched closer, leaning into him. Ola closed his eyes, only to feel his tender lips against his.

"Williams" He moaned, opening his lips just slightly enough to Will to slip his tongue through. And the pill melted now, on both their tongues. It was unlike anything he'd felt before.

And there was this flame that was ignited in him, a flame he never really thought was there. Williams held him close as Ola fell back on the bed-

that flame turned into a spark, and that spark into butterflies as he lifted up his shirt. Ola wanted this new feeling to stay, be it the drugs or Williams.

He wasn't sure how he was about to navigate through coming out and all that shit but he didn't want to think too much. He just wanted to stay in that very moment with Will.

And things ought to have been different, really.

He'd fantasized about a life where he stayed in Texas over a million times. Maybe he and Will would have been something, maybe he wouldn't have spent all of his senior hiding that part of him.

Maybe he would have been truthful to himself, and Obi. That all those times they were young, there was a part that liked him, perhaps more than a best friend. It was why it hurt him more each time he watched Obi turn into a different person. Each time he watched him get hurt.

But Ola never got that chance. The door burst open with James by the door, and the glass tray fell from his hands, shattering the ceramics to the floor.

Ola pushed Will from on top of him as he sat up, locking eyes with his uncle, who'd promised to give him everything. James could fathom everything, from the packet of Opioids next to him to the fact that he was sharing a passionate kiss with a boy.

It was then, Ola realized that James wasn't that different from his brother when it came down to things like this. It was September 2001 and everyone was pretty much the same. Conservative.

-

He was sucked back into his consciousness in the present day, and he clutched his racing heart. I did say there were a lot of ways we deal with pain. Or trauma and grief- -Ola happened to forget everything. It was the way his brain was wired, to completely let go of the times that hurt him, the memories that hurt him.

And up until that very moment, for six months he hadn't thought back at that.

The echoes immediately came rushing back to him, as if the floodgates of memories were freshly opened. And tears began to fall from his eyes-

"Don't you dare walk away from me"

His voice filled the room as Olamide slammed the door, it burst so hard at its hinge that it cracked a bit. He'd brushed past uncle James as he ravaged for his suitcase in the closet.

"Olamide. You come back here" James had a tone he had never heard before up until this moment. He could hear the footsteps come up the stairs and his heart jackhammered against his chest. He had escorted Will out of the house and held the opioid in his palms.

Pulling out his bottle of anxiety meds, Ola poured it onto his quivering hands and threw it in his mouth. It was then the door barged open again, leaving the cracked wood in nothing but pieces. His uncle halted, seeing his large suitcase across the unlaid bed.

Ola threw his head over his shoulders, before turning around. "Yeah, you better pack" James muttered, between halting breathes. "I've called your father and he'd have you on the earliest flight to Lagos tomorrow. Doing drugs, kissing boys-" He added, shaking his head in new found disappointment.

He couldn't bear to look into his eyes as if something as meagre as a kiss were equivalent to perhaps murder. He humped, with a half hearted chuckle as he stood.

He pulled away from him as James climbed over the broken door and when he was sure he had completely gone, Ola fell to the ground, leaning his back against the bed as tears streamed down his face.

The kind of tears that hurt the back of the throat.

He wasn't angry about the fact that he would leave for Nigeria in a few days, he was mad because he never got to say goodbye to Williams. He was robbed of that.

Obi could hear his sobs from behind the door as the effect of drugs began to wear off. He turned around to see it scattered on the ground, thanks to Ola. And he made his way to the bed-

-close to where Nathaniel was. "I'm sorry" He muttered to the wrong person, forcing himself to look away from the door. Nate reached for his hands. "Let's play a game" He whispered. And Obi nodded, somewhere between a miserable heartbroken sober freak and a zooted teenager.

"Are you okay?" Mira turned to him as he headed straight to the door. He had a hoodie over his head to shield his eyes. And he hummed, unlocking the front door. "Yeah yeah i am" He replied before running outside and down the front porch. Obi's voice echoed in his ears as he mounted his bike

-channeling all that anger into its pedals as he made his way unto the expressway. Mira watched him disappear from the windows and she arched her brows, suspecting not the slightest change. It was then Silva looked up at her, grabbing his keys.

"I've seen something" He alarmed, hefting the phone up to Mira. "Those sons of bitches" He bit down on his lips before he stood. Mira moved to him, still holding unto her silk robes.

"So where are we going now?" Her eyes narrowed at the keys in his hands. "To the general hospital. It's where Reginald goes to. Where they both go to. And where Jazz got her diagnosis and prognosis" "Prognosis?" Mira echoed and he pushed a lump down her throat. "She didn't have a very long to live because of the disease. And i assume Reg too" Like i said, everything was bound to change.

-

"Truth or dare" Obi sat up with his legs folded beneath him. "It's my turn" Nathaniel whispered to him as he still ruffled his inflamed cheeks.

He was fair, so the impact of the Ola's punch was still evident. But he had told Obi to let it go countless of times. He'd gotten in fights way worse. Obi backed away. "Go"

"Truth or dare" They locked eyes as his voice went serious and Obi's hand was against his thigh. "Truth" He whispered and Nate cleared his throat.

"What is your deepest secret?" He asked and Obi scoffed. His eyes darted from his as he heaved a deep breath, pulling away his palms. Nathaniel blew raspberry, chuckling a bit. "You don't have to ans—"

"I'm trans?" Obi replied with doubt in his voice. Now, he didn't know how he blurted it out so easily to Nathaniel. He didn't understand how everything was so easy when it came to him. Perhaps it was the drugs, or it was just the person. "Oh" He softly said, somewhere between a surprise and not much of a surprise. And he just went on, opening his arms. "Truth or dare" Obi mouthed, perplexed at how nothing was that big of a deal to Nate. It was why he called him a nihilist— but that was a very dangerous guess. "Dare"

Obi shook his head off thoughts as his eyes went to Nate's lips. "I dare you-" He looked into his eyes. "I dare you to do something you've always wanted to do" Obi whispered and Nate scoffed.

"That's easy" He whispered back, following his eyes till they landed on his lips. Obi filled his lungs with air as Nathaniel drew close. And close. And close, until they were mere centimeters apart and their heated breathes mixed in the air. He froze-

and so did Nate. And for a more than a second, they were just there, till Obi pulled away and fell back into his bed. There were tears in his eyes as he looked to the ceiling. "What am I doing?" He asked himself, recollecting how much his life had changed over the past week, that he was here.

And Nathaniel just looked at him, through this moment of self-realization. And they made eye contact. "I'm sorry" Obi whispered and he scoffed.

"There's no need to be"

"It's just-it wont be fair to you. And to me. And to Abdul" Tears were in his eyes. "He hurt me, and i wanted to hurt him back. I wanted to hurt everyone back but i ended up hurting myself more"

"I can't do this. I thought the drugs were supposed to make me forget the bad thoughts" He scrunched his nose and Nathaniel scoffed, falling back into the bed as well. Obi heaved a sigh, wiping beneath his nose as they locked eyes. "I love him" He said softly. "It's always going to be him and i fucked up the only good thing in my life, like i always do-" "Hey, hey" Nathaniel reached for his hands as he smiled. "Never say that" He said. "Isn't it true?"

"It's not true" He replied. "Look at Mide" Nate's eyes diverted to the door as if he were literally still there and he sighed. "That- that was my fault" He chuckled so much that Obi joined him too, on seeing how red his cheeks still were. "It's not funny" He said, between laughs and for the first time, Obi noticed his english accent and realized he knew nothing about this boy before him. However, this wasn't the time. He just needed to sleep off the effects of the drugs and hopefully find Ola to apologize to him.

But that is for when he'd be okay again.

"I'd never doing drugs again-" He faced the ceiling, holding unto his aching head as he sobbed. Nathaniel sat up on the bed, looking back and forth the window and his eyes. "I should go" He replied. Obi looked to him, nodding his head. "Yeah"

"Yeah you probably should" He heaved a deep breath as he slipped his feet into his slides and he looked to the floor. Without uttering another word, he walked through the door, closing it behind him. Obi had the whole room to think now.

He had the whole room to cry as the tears finally fell from his cheeks and he grabbed his pillow between his legs, wailing into it. It was by far the worst Valentine's day he'd spent. There was no Ab- There was no both of them anymore.

-

Fiyin was on the ground.

Her palms clenched her stomach, tempted to just squeeze her painful uterus. It were times like this, she hated being a woman-

-hated the fact that even after a week since the abortion, she still felt miserable. In excruciating pain and her eyes were red from all the tears she'd cried. Her throat was sore and her palms, pale.

"Are you there?" Deb asked over the phone, after hearing her throw up for the nth time. "You should go get some air" She suggested as Fiyin sighed. "I can't stand up" She cried. "Come on, Fi. You can't be miserable all day. You've got to eat something" Deb pressured her as she finally took a step forward.

"Air. Eat" She said again. "And call me when you're done" She continued as Fiyin stared at the phone which was miles away, on loudspeaker. The moment she caught her own reflection in the mirror, she was startled, almost resembling a walking dead.

Fiyin walked out of her room once the phone had cut and she saw about two apples on the kitchen counter and her father asleep on the couch. She had permanent tears in her eyes now as she staggered towards the fruit basket. "There have been new concerns about a mysterious illness that happens to be circu-" She bit into the apple, blocking out the voices that came from the television as she walked to the door.

Opening it, she was scared as if she'd turned to a vampire overnight that was suddenly afraid of daylight. It wasn't until heaving her nth breath, that she finally stepped outside. The winds breezed in her face and the sunshine lit her insides. "Oh my God" She whispered, folding her arms in each other. It'd been days since she'd come outside but it was worth it. Staring over her open compounds till he closed her eyes, assuming she was somewhere other than here. "Fiyin" She suddenly heard her name and she shot it open at the familiar voice. And over her low fence was somebody from school-

-he was in a sweatshirt and jeans and Fi rolled her eyes to the back. "Nathaniel" She called his name and he just stood there, with half a smirk. "Can i come in?" He waved, pretending to freeze to death.

And she sighed, about to form the most shocking alliance with the school newbie the moment she opened her door to him. "You don't look so good" Was the first thing he said as he walked in. She looked him dead in the eyes. "You too"

-

"Do things actually get better?" Mira whispered to him. "Or do we just get used to it?" Silva looked to her as the intercom echoed through the hospital hallways. "Dr Olabisi, please come to OR 7-" Was what fell on his ears as he looked around.

"What?"

Mira shrugged her shoulders, clutching her purse to her blue jacket which she'd changed into. "I've just been thinking" She locked eyes with him. And then she looked to the phone she still had in her hands.

"They both knew" She whispered again, out of the blues. "That they were sick. AIDS" Silva nodded, haven read the same thing from the texts. "And they didn't have that much time" She continued. "Why would he lie to us that they lost contact?"

"I don't know" He looked to Mira. "And if it's that contagious, we know two people that have it now, how many more, and why isn't it in the news?" Silva mouthed, clearly enough. "Mira, i don't know"

"But whatever it is, i don't think it's good" He took the obvious as he suddenly sighted the receptionist of that day. He rose from the seat and went towards her. On recognizing him, she slouched in displeasure and he walked up to her desk again.

"I know my friend's here. And if you don't take me to him, i will riot and i will turn this place upside down and i will make sure everyone here knows what you're hiding-" She looked in his eyes and could tell he was serious. Almost as serious as a person with a gun in his hands.

And she backed away. "I'll let them know of AIDS"

Mira's fingers brushed against his cold palms and he held unto it. She looked around the waiting room before stepping outside of her desk. "Come this way" She whispered beneath her breath, and as he trailed behind her, his phone buzzed in his pockets.

Mira looked to him. "David" He mouthed, placing the phone to his ears. "Tell him you'll call him later" She replied as they were headed towards the very back of the building. Mira arched her brows on getting close to what seemed to be an antiseptic room. "What is this?" DaSilva questioned as if he was being tricked. "I'm not joining-" He added.

It was then the receptionist halted, taking from the counter and handing him some scrubs and gloves. And masks, and even safety googles.

Silva looked to his hands and she pointed to the door. "Protect yourself. It's unlike anything you've ever seen before" She whispered and Mira peered through the glassed doors at the multitude of patients that laid across the numerous beds in one large ward.

Her jaw dropped the moment her eyes went to the tag above the crowded room- HIV WARD. And all that echoed in her ears were those last words.

"It's unlike anything you've seen before" It was true.

To be continued...