Arranged To The Alpha
Chapter 11

Natalia:

I ran my fingers through Blake’s dark brown hair as he slept. His chest peacefully rising and falling with each breath he took. His features calm, and the IV needle in his hand.

His body having given up on fighting, the man finally got a little rest. His body’s temperature finally settling to a normal one, the man was no longer sweating or shivering with each breath he took. I couldn’t help but smile in contentment at the thought of him healing.

My eyes stayed fixed on him as sparks ran through my body. The fact that I knew that he could have died had I not arrived on time made my heart clench with fear. Fear that I didn’t understand, nor did I try to. But everything seemed to be messed up anyway, from the sparks that I felt when I was around him, to the pain I felt seeing him in pain, I couldn’t understand any of them.

“Natalia, you need to eat something” Ryan said handing me a plate. I have been here since yesterday, only leaving Blake’s side to go to the bathroom, which was also in the same room. I nodded and took the plate from him, taking a bite out of the roast beef sandwich he brought me. My body felt drained of energy and the glass of water which he placed on the bedside table felt like heaven to me as I took a sip of it. The cold liquid running down my dried throat, cooling it as it went.

“Thank you” I said softly. He nodded and squeezed my shoulder gently.

“It should be us who are thanking you, have you not reached him in time…”

“I don’t want to think about it, but I’m glad that things didn’t go wrong” I said honestly. He and Mason have spent hours beside me, but they both eventually needed to get their rest as to be able to hold their responsibilities the next morning. I had called the office and told them to take care of things from their side, there wasn’t much to do today anyway.

“Well, either way, I have to thank you for what you did. You may not understand it, but losing your Alpha to another…”

“Would force you all to submit to that Alpha” I said finishing his sentence “I know the laws of nature, Ryan, I may have not known that YOU guys were wolves; but that doesn’t mean that I don’t now what wolves are”

“Well, for someone who was surprised that Alpha Blake killed a man who crossed his territory…”

“That’s a different case. Seeing a man die right before my eyes wasn’t something I expected on my first night being here. This whole marriage just seems to go wrong to begin with, I just don’t know what or how to feel about it” I said honestly. My eyes remained fixed on the laying man in front of me. The fact that he would argue with me about the most random things at times, his hate toward me, I was willing to accept it all provided that he got up from this state.

“Who’s Myla?” I asked turning to face Ryan who frowned. I knew it wasn’t my business, but it was my curiousity which drove me to asking.

“How’d you know her name?”

“Blake called me Myla before shifting…”

“She is, or was, his mate” Ryan said and I nodded. The pain in my chest intensified and I found it harder to breath at that moment. The fact that he had called her name when he was in need made me feel worthless, especially since I knew that it would have been impossible to fake it “do you want to go and get some sleep?”

“Don’t worry about me, Ryan. You have work to do, I’ll stay here in case he wakes up or needs anything” I said putting the plate on the bedside table having lost my appetited. The funny part was, I didn’t understand why it concerned me to begin with. The man and I were only married on paper, whether he slept with women and was calling for them, or was calling for his mate, why would it concern me?

“Do you think you’re the first person he wants to see when he wakes up?” Ryan asked making my heart drop. I frowned and turned to face him. His eyebrow was raised at me as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked standing up to face him. His eyes were as hard as his Alpha’s whenever he looked at me, and I was starting to believe that both shared the same impression when it came to me; both the Alpha and his Beta hated me with everything they had in them, at least that’s what I saw.

“Are you the first person your Alpha wants to see when you’re the reason he left the house to begin with?” Ryan asked again, I could swear that his eyes have shifted to golden for a second as his wolf made himself known for a second. He blinked his eyes back to normal, clearly controlling himself “if you think that I don’t know that you’re the one who angered him to begin with, then you’re very wrong. You saving his life doesn’t mean that you weren’t the reason it was risked”

His words hit me like a dagger, and for the first time since I arrived to this hellhole, I couldn’t find an answer to give. Therefore, I nodded and chose to walk out of the room, careful not to show my tears which threatened to fall from my eyes. It could have been considered childish of me not to accept him speaking to me, or to just walk out like some kid, but I didn’t want to end up saying or doing something that I might end up regretting, and at this point, I knew that it was bound to happen.

“Natalia?” Mason asked catching sight of me. His eyes were wide in confusion, but I simply passed him and walked up to my room. The guilt that filled me was one that I hadn’t expected to feel. Partly because I too blamed myself for what happened to Blake, the fact that he went out was my fault. However, thinking about it, I was inside MY room, the room which they chose to imprison me in, how could I have been blamed for him coming to me?

“Deep breath Natalia” I said to myself. My own eyes remained fixed on the wall in front of me as I tried calming myself. My body felt like it was on fire, literally, and I knew that it was my anger running through my veins. I walked to the bathroom and washed my face, the water boiling in my palms as it poured on in my hands, but I didn’t care, I needed to cool my body off, and water was the only way to do it.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror and sighed. I brought this up to myself, these men wouldn’t have been crossing this many limits if I knew to mind my own. I had married the man to hold the partnerships that were made between him and my family, the family that has adopted me years ago and was making sure I paid them back the debt I owed.

I closed the water faucet and sighed taking a deep breath, my eyes remaining fixed on my reflection as I struggled to keep myself calm, quiet, and controlled. I wasn’t a person to give up, or give in, nor did I grow to submit to a person’s harsh words. But if the laws of nature said that one must submit to a pack’s Alpha, who was I to object?

I was nothing in this world but a small speck of dust who was trying to enforce a certain power which wasn’t hers to do so. That itself was wrong, and as an element manipulator, I should have known that even before anyone brought that up to me.

“You will go back to the way you were, Natalia, your duty here is to hold a marriage. But you have you own duties when it comes to yourself, it’s not up to you to know who the man was, what he wants, or who his mate is. Focus on your reasons, and your company, everything else is nothing more than a distraction” I said speaking to myself. If anyone was listening in to this conversation, and I’m guessing they were, they would be thinking that I was mad. But I didn’t care anymore. Ryan’s words were more painful that he could have imagined, but it wasn’t up to me to judge him for them, the man said what he did to keep his Alpha safe.

I stripped out of my clothes and entered the shower. My body having cooled down, but I needed to clean myself from all of this, and it wasn’t just the dirt and sweat that I was talking about. My mind went back to him shifting and laying his forehead against my own, his wolf listening to me despite the fear he was in. I smiled for a second before frowning.

“Snap out of it, Natalia, it’s not worth the energy”