Arrow Inferno
Chapter 31: Jeremy Stanton vs. Ryan Hicks Feral attraction in the midst of hatred… Real talk!

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"Shit." He shuddered to imagine what someone like Jeremy would do if anything happened to his mate. "But I'm not officially your ma...'

"It's just a ceremony. To let everyone know you're my mate. It's a very important ceremony. But it doesn't mean you're any less my mate now." "Why do you people bother with it then?" Ryan scoffed.

"You will probably gain some abilities after I mark you. Become stronger, share some of my abilities, and generally gain the respect of everyone in the pack...and beyond."

"As if I need all that." Ryan snickered but Jeremy ignored his words and went on.

"Oh and this attraction or lust or whatever you call it will become even more intense but controlled and sweeter. Well, that's what I'm told."

"I definitely don't need that."

"Well, what I'm trying to explain is that even though that ceremony hasn't taken place, I'll still lose it should anything happen to you. And I don't think it will do anyone any good." Jeremy said quietly.

"Hmm...for starters, that ceremony is not going to happen. But I'm curious... Do we have to go through that ceremony before you get the urge to avenge me when someone hurts me?" Ryan tilted his head to the side and gave Jeremy a calculating look which Jeremy didn't miss.

"As I said, I don't need some ceremony to feel that way," Jeremy responded, wondering where Ryan was going with that line of questioning.

"So what are you waiting for?" Ryan asked with a sneer. "Need I point you to the individual who has hurt me most in my thirty-one years of existence?" Ryan asked in a low voice. Jeremy froze. "The one person who has made me wish for death. Or is the almighty Ojah Alpha above the law?"

"Do you have any idea what I'm going through?" Jeremy whispered with so much anguish in his voice.

"Hey, I'm the one that got wronged here. Why the fuck should I care what you're going through? Why don't you do to yourself whatever you would do to anyone who harms your mate?" Ryan growled.

"Is that what you want?" Jeremy asked with a sudden calm which actually scared Ryan. "'Cause in my opinion, anyone who has the nerve to do what I did to you, shouldn't live to tell that tale. I'd destroy them."

Ryan looked into Jeremy's eyes and blanched at what he saw. There was determination, finality, and calmness. Somehow he just knew that Jeremy was ready to kill himself if he gave the nod. And Ryan had never been more terrified in his life than he was at that particular moment. The panic within him swelled until with a tortured groan, he stepped close to Jeremy and reached out to touch his chest.

"Don't even think what you're thinking." Ryan rasped. "I didn't mean you should off yourself." Then Ryan said in the coldest voice he could manage... "If you ever do anything to yours..."

"What do you want me to do then?" Jeremy asked exasperatedly. "You wanted me to do to myself what I would do to someone who..."

"Shut the fuck up and listen to me you asshole," Ryan growled angrily, shocking Jeremy. No one spoke to him like that. Not even his mother. "Don't even attempt to do anything stupid." Jeremy's eyes widened at the threat and blatant desperation in Ryan's voice. He didn't think Ryan even noticed how hard he was shaking. "Give me your word, Jeremy."

"I thought my word meant nothing to you," Jeremy murmured as his arms went around Ryan to draw him close. Just like any normal werewolf, his foremost instinct was to comfort his mate whenever he was distressed. And the Ryan who stood in front of him was anything but calm. He couldn't help the small smile that curved his mouth when Ryan pressed against him.

"It will do for now," Ryan said, leaning the side of his face against Jeremy's chest. "Do I have it?" He asked softly.

"You do." Jeremy's voice was barely above a whisper. Having Ryan in his arms was such an awesome feeling he wished he would never leave. "Thank you."

"That doesn't mean I'm any less angry at you," Ryan mumbled.

"I know." Jeremy sighed.

"I'll stay here." Ryan stepped away from Jeremy. Being plastered against him like that was making it difficult to think. "But I'll need my space."

"I'll convert your room into a study for you."

"Thanks but I'll need more than that." Ryan grimaced. "I want to be able to go to my place whenever I want. You see...I've been independent almost all my life. And I don't think I can cope very well with...this." He threw his arm in a wide arc indicating his current situation.

"I understand."

"You can turn that room into a study for me but make sure you leave the bed? 'Cause that's where I'll be sleeping." Ryan saw the crushed look on Jeremy's face but resisted the urge to give him what he knew he wanted. Jeremy couldn't possibly expect him to agree to jump into bed with him under the circumstances, could he?

Jeremy swallowed hard. "I understand." The alpha responded in a small voice which caused Ryan's heart to tighten with sadness.

"I'll be in the next room Jeremy," Ryan said with a deep sigh.

"I under..."

"Will you stop with the 'I understands' already?" Ryan snapped. "I'm being generous here under the circumstances."

"I know and I'm grateful," Jeremy said quietly.

"Good. I'll be going to school around ten a. m. to sort out my timetable so I need to catch some sleep. Good talk." With that Ryan abruptly turned and went back to his room. Jeremy didn't try to stop him. Just being able to stop Ryan from severing their bond was okay for Jeremy because that would have been a disaster. He knew he had a big problem though. His mate had no intention of going through the ceremony to be marked by him. But somehow, Jeremy didn't care as his main goal was gaining Ryan's forgiveness, and also getting him to like him. He'd thought hard about it on his ran. And he intended to accomplish his goal come what may. He hadn't known Ryan for long but he'd come to really care for him which surprised him. Naturally, being his mate meant he would care for Ryan, which was basically all that a mate wanted...care for his or her mate. But whether one's mate showed the same affection back or not didn't really matter. Therefore Jeremy wanting Ryan to genuinely like him surprised him as that definitely had nothing to do with the fact that they were mates.

The alpha knew that the first step to getting Ryan to like him was gaining his trust. Jeremy however couldn't help but acknowledge the fact that his high-handed nature was not helping his cause. For instance, on impulse, he'd gone to Ryan's apartment and brought part of his belongings to his home, which had obviously pissed Ryan off. Jeremy knew he needed to make an effort not to piss his mate off again with his actions. He was used to taking matters into his own hands and making decisions for people without considering their feelings. He called it an occupational hazard.

As alpha, he had to be firm and authoritarian sometimes otherwise other wolves would think he was weak and challenge him for his position. No one had ever dared challenge him though. And Jeremy chose to believe that was because of his style of ruling rather than the fear for their lives as he tried to be fair in all his dealings.

He needed his mate's forgiveness. It wasn't going to be easy but Jeremy was determined to do whatever it took. He hadn't been surprised at his readiness to kill himself earlier when Ryan had hinted at him avenging him because he felt that anyone who acted as he had, didn't deserve to live. And if that was going to make Ryan happy, he was prepared to do it. He would rather end it all by killing himself than kill his wolf by allowing his mate to server their bond. That would be like making his wolf take the fall for his actions. He could never do that. He couldn't live even a day with that guilt. For his wolf and his pack, he had to make things right with his mate. Jeremy didn't have a plan. But he vowed to himself not to rush Ryan. He was just going to be himself...as real as he could be...and hope Ryan would give him a chance.

"Give me strength Luna." He prayed under his breath.

Alpha Jeremy Stanton could definitely use some divine intervention.