Claimed By My Three Alphas
Chapter 168

AMERY'S POV

He disappeared again.

Just minutes after Levi came back this morning, he was nowhere to be found.

Its already night time. I'm curled up on the sofa, freshly showered and well-rested. Asher and Quincy stepped out as well, something about needing to get meat in their system.

I don't really get it, considering there's now a relative abundance of food in this house. But I've only ever shifted once, so I can't expect to understand the dynamics of what it's like being a werewolf. There's a soft curse, and then I hear the sound of a dull thud coming from the back. The boys should be back.

I stroll to the kitchen, picking up a bottle of water from the counter as I go. When I reach the back door, the sound of cackling fire reaches my ears.

I smile, pulling it open, "You guys are grilling already?"

Messy, blank hair moves into my line of vision.

"Oh," I whisper, my steps faltering, "You're back."

Levi sits on the wooden steps, wearing nothing but a pair of boxer briefs. There's a wildfire raging in front of him, a makeshift roast. Three squirrels are skewered to the post. Another three lay lifeless on the ground beside the fire.

He lifts his head as I approach, sparing a glance over his shoulder. He turns back to stare at the fire

Hift my eyebrows, nodding once and pursing my lips behind him. That was a dismissal if I'd ever seen one.

I turn to go back inside.

"Wait."

His voice barely carries through the windy night, or the noise raging from the burning wood. But it's loud enough to stop me in my tracks, almost involuntarily.

I turn to look at him. His head drops low between his shoulders. I watch as he shakes it slowly back and forth," Don't go yet."

"Please," the word is soft as it slips out of him, his hand reaching out and landing on the spot next to him, "Stay for a while." My heart clenches.

I shouldn't listen. I should just ignore him and walk back through the door.

Hot and cold, remember.

My feet move on their instinct, I settle into the spot beside him.

We're silent for a long lime

"Why aren't you wearing any clothes?"

He gestures to the dead squirrels, "My wolf hunted the game."

"Oh."

His head swivels to me. Were so close, I can count each fair eyelash framing his moonlit grey orbs. His lips are parted slightly, and I'm breathless, watching as his eyes-trail over every inch of my face.

His brows pull together as his hand reaches out, sweeping gently over the apple of my cheek, "You're so beautiful."

I break out in hives. His thumb caresses my skin like I'm made of glass.

Hot and cold, Amery.

Hot and cold.

I grab his wrist, summoning every ounce of willpower within me to pull away from his touch.

He shakes his head, as though clearing it, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

I don't say a word, honestly, I'm not sure what I could even say.

To claim that things between the both of us have been messy would be the understatement of the century.

But now, with all the revelations that have come to light, things aren't so black and white.

As much as I'd hate to admit it, I can understand why he's tried to kill me all those times. What I don't want to let go of though, is why he had to take so much from me in the process. He didn't have to pretend to care about me, neither did he have to let things escalate to the point where I fell in love with him.

To the point where I gave him my body, something I'd never given anyone else.

My lips curl, and the bitterness pools low in my belly, "Why am I here, Levi?"

"Because I want you to be."

My head whips to stare at him.

He backtracks, "I'm sorry," he says, lifting his hands, "I didn't mean it like that. I'm not trying to be an ass."

I'm quiet, watching him. He sighs deeply, running a hand through his hair.

"I need..." he begins, "I need to apologize, Amery. I need to let you know how fucking sorry I am."

My chin lifts, I don't want to open up my emotions to him.

Every single time I've let that happen, all hes done is make me regret it.

He's staring at the ground now, "I need to get you to stop looking at me the way you do."

"How do I look at you?"

He lifts his gaze to the fire, I see the cackling flames licking up the walls of his dark irises, "Like you wish you'd never met me." His voice is deeper now, "Like I'm the worst thing to ever happen to you." His eyes meet mine, and even I can't deny the absolute despair hiding behind his gaze, "Like you hate me."

My throat bobs, "I have every right."

He nods immediately, "You do." His hands lift, dragging over his mouth, "There's nothing on earth I could say to justify what I've done to you, Amery. I see that now. But once upon a time, I had it in my head that I was doing the right thing."

My brows pull together, theres a pained expression on my face, "Which part of it?"

He knows what I mean, and he looks away from me. "I'm so sorry for everything."

"I understand you need to save yourself and your brothers.

If I were put in your shoes, who knows, maybe I would have had the same goals. But treating me like some object for your entertainment? That's not just unfair, it's inhumane." His head hangs low, but I go on, "I would have never done that to anyone. There's a difference between you getting rid of me because it's what you thought needed to be done, and what you did." "I trusted you, Levi." I continue, hating the crack in my voice,

"I really, really trusted you. I opened up to you in ways I never have with anyone else. You took so much from me, and you were never satisfied. Did you ever stop to consider how all of it would affect me? Or did you just tell yourself you were going to kill me anyway? So why not milk me for all the fun you could get."

"f**k, no." He says, "No, I... Listen, I know you don't want to believe this, but everything I said I felt for you was true.

Amery, I never lied about that part." I move to rise to my feet.

He turns his whole body to me, grabbing my arms on either side to stop me, "Wait. Wait." His eyes dart left and right, he's holding onto me so tight, "Please don't go. Please, just.. hear me out. Please." Reluctantly, my body relaxes.

He sighs again, relieved, but he still doesn't let go of me.

"I've tried to kill you, more than once. You know the reason I had it out for you, I was only trying to save my brothers. I barely knew you, and I was so mad, that some random girl had the fate of my family in her hands, I couldn't wrap my head around it, I wanted you gone." He watches me for my reaction, "But then, I got to know you. I spent all that time around you. At first, it was a game, it was fun, shoving you around and seeing how much you could take before I'd break you. Eventually, it morphed into something else. My. feelings for you changed, f**k, it caught me completely off guard."

"I kept trying to remind myself that regardless of how good you are, or how I felt about you, you still needed to die, that I still needed to be the one to kill you. But it got to a point when I realized, I was only fooling myself. There was no way I'd be able to follow through with it."

"That night at the cabin was real. I wasn't lying when I told you I loved you. Amery, I never lied about my feelings for you." he pauses, swallowing hard, "And after... after we... after we had s*x, I had a nightmare. It was out of nowhere and it freaked the hell out of me." I remember that of course, how could I forget? The morning after the best night of my life, when he'd woken up a completely different person from the man I'd known so intimately, pushing me away.

I hate the memory.

I wish I could burn it out of my mind forever.

"I had marked you, in the nightmare. Asher and Quincy died before my eyes."

I suck in a breath. That, I never knew.

"Yeah," he says, nodding his head, "It was f*kd up. And it scared me. I was given the responsibility to protect them, and they died because of me. My mom was in that dream."

His eyes slide shut, "She cursed at me, blamed me for not looking after them, blamed me for their death."

I'm shivering and it's not because of the weather.

"And so l. panicked. That morning, ljust needed to get away from you. And my head was so f****d up. It felt like that dream was a message, and that I needed to get my s**t together. I had what Madeline gave me but I never thought about actually using it till then, and after everything, I told myself that no matter how much it hurt, I would be doing the right thing. And so I took you to the waterfall, to dinner. Now this, this I swear on my life, Amery.

When you lifted that glass to drink the wine, I changed my mind."

My lips twist. I can barely see him through the tears blurring my vision. I don't want to believe any of this, but I sat down here with my heart wide open. I'm seconds away from turning into a sobbing mess.

"I wasn't going to let you drink it, Amery." He's looking at me with eyes so sincere, it's impossible not to give in to his words, "Asher showed up before I could stop you, though.

And then everything went to s**t. You have to believe me, I'm not trying to play mind games anymore, I only want to give you the truth from here on out.".

"You were the only one who told me about the prophecy," I whisper.

He doesn't say anything, he's still holding on to me tightly.

"I never knew that was the nightmare you had. Im so sorry, Levi. That must have been so horrible for you."

His face blanches, then pulls taut like he's in pain, "I don't get it," he says, shaking his head,

"How can you feel sorry

for me? After everything I did you."

"I never lied about my feelings either, Levi." I tell him, "I loved you, that was real."

He lets go of me then, slowly, his eyes drop to my thighs, " Loved?" he whispers, "As in, past tense?"

I can't help the sob that tumbles out of me. My chest constricts painfully, "That's not a fair question to ask me!"

His jaw works, "I know."

"You don't know!" I cry.

He nods his head, multiple times. The tears are falling freely now, down my face.

"I'm sorry," he says again, "'m so f**rig sorry."

I get to my feet, and he doesn't try to stop me this time.

With a hand on the door handle, I pause, The words are forced out of me in a whisper, "Love." I say, "I never stopped."