Divorced, But Not Broken
Divorced, but Not broken Chapter 178

"Oh, it holds up, that's just not one result, Pretty, it's three that I did when I found out this f*****g mess..." he stopped, having food shoved inside his moth, eating like a beast, but I didn't care, he was the only one that still cared about me it seemed, he was an angel, and he should be made into a saint if I had any say in the matter. "I don't know.... Maybe she got desperate enough to pay some sucker, and that's all you need, Pretty. Money can change a lot of things...." Tom stopped, swallowing whatever he was eating on hard, making me smile at him, look at him f*****g helping me, my real savior in all this mess. Maybe I should marry him and be done with it?

"Money.... Yeah.... I don't have that... I mean... I do... but not like the Sullivans... shit... it's going to be hard going up against them, even though Jonah isn't going to do shit to help me...." I fell down one of the chairs, regretting my decision when my stomach was still hurting. I was never having another child again, no matter how f*****g good it felt when someone was f*****g me, never!

"You don't need that, not for them... just her...." He pointed to Kira... making my heart sink, seeing her smile at Tom when he pointed to her. Well yeah... she was Jonah's biological child. Nothing could change that, not even Tom, who smiled back at her, looking so ******g charming like he always did when he wanted to.

“F**k...." I was cursing again, making Kira frown. That was another thing Buck had told her, that you shouldn't swear...well, here I was alone, and he was off f*****g Sarah somewhere that lying stupid, backstabbing... I stopped when my own face turned red from thinking of Buck, it was killing me being back here. He didn't even clean out his shit when he told me he wanted a divorce. Probably just stayed back at his old house, helping that useless wife he had before me!

"You not supposed to say bad words, mommy. Otherwise, you are having a time out!" she was pointing to her room when I made a slight snicker trying to calm down, feeling my blood pressure rising every second. Yeah, I sure as hell needed one. "Yeah, you right, baby... I'm sorry, I'm just furious at your Da and.... Daddy..." I hated that Tom smirked so much, hearing me say that word, making me blush from how he stared at me like he just wanted to start laughing again at my weird behavior. "I like Da... but I love Daddy..." Kira made a pout that meant she was going to cry. I felt the same way when she looked up from her drawing, making my heart break. Goddam Buck, for doing this to us!

"I know... I know Kira baby... just..... daddy isn't going to be here anymore and... I'm going to talk to him, and maybe you can stay with him later, okay?" I hated that I had to sound so cheerful. I wasn't feeling cheerful at all talking about Buck. I still loved him. That was the worst part. No matter what he did and said, my stupid heart couldn't just switch off. I loved him so much.

Tom didn't say anything this time. He looked sad, that big baboon, and I sighed for the tenth time seeing him in my kitchen, looking so out of place and still fitting in my life.

"Okay, but you better talk to him fast, mommy. He doesn't like it when you don't tell him stuff..." Kira gave a shrug when she got up and took her drawing with her making me want to cry even more. She wanted him back so much when she walked down the hallway, looking inside our bedroom like Buck would be there. Oh fuck I had no idea how I was supposed to go inside of it either, to be honest.

"she's just like Jonah... cocky as hell...." Tom made a trying chuckle that I nodded to, not looking at him. Yeah, she was no doubt about that, she was Jonah's child, but he wasn't her daddy. No matter how hard he tried, that spot had already been taken. "Yeah... she is like Jonah... but Tom, I really don't want Jonah to win this custody battle if it comes to it. She needs me, more than just being about whenever you feel like it..." I stopped smiling when he did, too. He got it. He wasn't an only child and full of himself, so yes, he was full of himself and shallow, but he had a heart, and he got what I was saying. The family took more time than I believed Jonah had, even if he had the best intentions.

"Got it..." He looked down at the first boy that started to fuzz, and my boobs were leaking. Great, so now I needed to focus on that. This was going to be much more complicated than I ever had imagined, all alone in a town where people would laugh at me, seeing Buck with Sarah... oh god... I took him up and pulled out my boob, not giving a shit about Tom. He had seen me naked before.

"I can stay and help... I mean, I still got to spy for Jonah, might as well do inside instead of standing outside, getting my skin burned off in the damn heat..." Tom took another bite from whatever was in the casserole he was eating from that wasn't mine when I made a shrug caressing the small boy's head, the few strands being not darker like Kira had been but light, sure why not, at least I knew that he wasn't standing outside my bedroom window looking inside when I got dressed.

"Stay as long as you like, Tom; it's not like I got anyone else that will be here ...." He stopped smirking when I stared at the boy drinking from my boob. I just wanted to be happy with my kids. Was that too much to ask?

"Yeah, I can't stay forever..... you know, until you settled..." He made one of his apologetic smiles like he always did when something terrible happened that wasn't his fault. He was covering for Jonah, and now Buck, great. "You are a good friend...and brother...." I hated that it was hard to say that I never had a brother, and still, he was like one, not like James had been, but... yeah, he had my back in his own way. "You know I am. Look at me, Pretty, I'm f*****g amazing!"

"Made you laugh at least, well that it then, got to go rapport back and I will come back later..." Tom got up when I made a nod at him walking out the door. What a weird fucking life I had.