Divorced, But Not Broken
Divorced, but Not broken Chapter 182

"Hey, Daisy...." Tom smiled when he saw her, and she blushed more. I was still too stunned to understand what was happening. What in the f*****g world was she doing here, Buck's daughter!? No! No f*****g way! She was going to tell on me; she loved Buck, and there "hey....Oh... shit Andrea.... You look like... crap..." I was still gasping when she walked inside, not hesitating even if she didn't expect to see me; she was taking this way better than me, still standing beside my kids and trying not to let Kira attack her. I still didn't know if I trusted anyone of them!

was no way she would ever keep a secret about me hiding here. She didn't deserve to be dragged inside this mess. She was just seventeen!

"Sophia.... you shouldn't be here...." I was stammering, not being able to keep Kira contained. I finally rushed her, seeing someone she knew breaking my heart again. Shit, I really messed up, didn't I? Kira was suffering, maybe even more than me. I just wanted to make it right for her and the small boys still in their sitters, making Sophia drop whatever she had and cry when she was hugging Kira, looking down. I was kneeling on the floor, the villain in her world, and I was still staring at her when she kissed Kira again. She really loved her; everyone did when I made a soft sound, trying not to start crying. I didn't even know why. I was so sick of trying, and Tom had made sure that an underage girl was involved with the f*****g mob, and she probably didn't even know! "Andrea, where the f**k have you been!? You have no idea how much dad had been looking for you! Everyone has!" she was looking up at me, accusing, when I did another soft nod. Yeah, I sure he did, and I didn't want to be found, and now everything was blown because Tom couldn't take it anymore, and I didn't blame him. I really didn't.

"Take it easy on her, Daisy.... You know what happened...." I looked up at Tom's concerned face. He was suffering for me, always was when she stopped scowling, so she knew.... Always was way too smart for her age. I hated that she was here, not just for the kids and me; she was so young. Me meeting Buck had changed her life, seeing that she still was in love with the stupid idiot that was staring right back at her.

Mary would kill him when she found out she wasn't even eighteen.

"Yes... yes... I'm sorry.... Princess Kira.... what have you made?" she was going with Kira, that was showing her something she had made, proud when I was still kneeling on the floor, crying sitting in the middle of my twins that was making noises; this was supposed to be a happy part of my life, not running for my life, taking alone an innocent teen to my downfall.

"Look at that, so beautiful..... and look, that is your brothers, right?" Sophia was getting closer, having Kira take her forward, when I was still crying and looking like shit. I didn't want to look at her young face, see that she hated me for just leaving, taking along her brothers, same as Kira, this was Bucks babies, and I bet she could see it. Anyone could!

"That's Jamie, and that's Noah... he cries more, but I still love him!" Kira was proud again, she was when Sophia made a sniffle, taking her hand and stroking over the cheek of Noah, making him look at her to my surprise, and he smiled, f**k! Why didn't he smile at me!?

"Andrea.... Please.... Dad needs to know about this..."she was looking at Kira; that was all ears when I made a whimper. He needed to know what? That he was the father of Noah and James? He didn't care before, and I didn't want him back anymore, not after he dumped me at the hospital after their birth and chose Sarah.

"Hey Kira, I know a place with ice cream that's really good. You want to get some? we can have some for mommy and Sophia too?" Tom was already grabbing Kira, that wasn't even arguing back, she heard the word ice cream, and she was following him, making me give him a thankful look. He sucked for taking Sophia to my hideout, but he still was the best.

"This is dad, kids, and don't tell me bullshit. I have seen enough photos of my brothers and me to see that you have f*****g kidnapped my siblings!" she was hissing it when the door closed, and I sat down on my a*s, trying to make sense of what she was telling me, I was a kidnapper!? Buck didn't even want them!?

"I don't care, I don't care whatever shit that Thomas had told you, but these are my sons, and I don't care who f****d me for it..." she didn't even look embarrassed anymore, so what that I was saying it? She would rat me out to Buck the second she got out of here! "I care, and you should. Dad is going crazy back home, you have no idea what he has been through, and here you are, hiding like a damn coward, alone and using Tom!" was she scolding me? I made a snide smile back at her angry face. She had no idea what she was getting herself involved in. No matter what lies Tom had told her, he didn't tell her more than she needed to know; the rest she had figured out, like I said, to be smart for her own good.

"He has you kids and your mother...." I hated that I sounded so bitter. I was a bitter old woman these days, not even able to get a better job than a stupid temp that didn't make half of what I did when I was married to Buck!

Sophia was the one looking snide now. She really thought I was the bad guy in this. Her family had destroyed me more than once! Her own brother was a f*****g perv, and her mother a trainwreck!

"He has nobody, and you know that too; as I said, Andrea... I'm not stupid, and the one that's around when the parties are over..." she was stroking Noah's head more, smiling when he made a smile back, breaking my heart. I couldn't even smile at my precious babies, and I knew it! f**k, I was a useless mother!

"I didn't even know you had them; everyone just was so wrapped up that Mitch got hurt and..." she stopped when I still didn't answer, yeah that part too... did she even know why he was hurt, or that it was her obvious crush that had hurt him?

"I know what happened and .... Well, I'm sorry, I am... I'm not defending Mitch for what he did, but... he is really hurt... shit..." she made a sniffle when I just sighed; none of this was pretty, and that's why I didn't want her to be here, she had no idea what she had been pulled inside of, and it was all my fault.

"Sophia.... I'm telling you this.... Please leave, don't come back, and don't tell your dad about this; it's better this way...." I wasn't even looking at her face. How could I? she was here, making me feel even worse over what had happened; it was easier to see Mitch as this monster that used girls, but he still had a family, and his sister was hurting.

"Leave?!" she almost growled at me now; she was so much more like Buck than he ever saw, just as stubborn and hotheaded as they are all where.

"No, that's not going to work out; you look like you are about to go under, taking my siblings along! I mean, come on, Andrea; did you even see Kira!? She wasn't happy, and you know that, so why are you telling me to leave when you clearly need some help!?" she was standing up over me, condemning me when I still didn't look at her, so she was angry at me, well she could join the club of people that wanted to kill me than...

"it's just the way it is..." I said back cold, finally lifting my eyes to meet hers, this was not up for debate, and she wasn't even eighteen! She had nothing to say about anything!

"You have no fucking idea what you got yourself into, Sophia, and I don't want any more suffering on my consciousness! You better not believe that bastard when he says something because he is a liar. You get that, don't you? That is what guys like him do for a living: he lies and helps bad people get more money!" I was getting up after her. She didn't even need to know who I was talking about since I made it very clear it was Tom still staring her dead into the hard blue eyes she got after her mother.

"I know what he does; always have Andrea. Do you think you are the only one with something to lose? I love him!" I smirked upon hearing that. Oh, she loved him?! What the fuck did she know about love anyway!? She was a sheltered stupid teenager that saw the first attractive guy that kissed her and followed him, just like I did when Ryan decided that he wanted to distract himself for eight years with me after Kayla!

"Love him.... Please...." I was smirking even more, unable to stop the sarcastic snicker that followed when Sophia looked even more hurt; whatever she had, it wasn't love. No, it couldn't be! I knew Tom, and he wasn't that guy! Just fucked girls over and pretended to be nice, the same as everyone else I had ever met!

"Yeah, I love him, why wouldn't I? he loves me back, even told me...." I stopped laughing. No, no, no, no! that was not even going to happen! There would be no love between Jonah's left fucking hand and my ex-husband's underage daughter, nope!

"Sophia, I'm fucking telling you right now, you go back home, and you don't come back here! Is that fucking understood?!" I was sneering in her face when she had crossed her arms, Jamie made a threatening noise like he was about to cry hearing me raise my voice, but I was not just going to stand here and watch Sophia ruin her life for what, because of that idiot that helped me, said that he loved her!? That was ridiculous!

"You are not my mother, and I don't fucking listen to you!" Sophia was smirking at me now, making me lose whatever cool I had, almost not knowing what to do anymore, thinking for the slightest second that she would listen. Still, she wasn't, and I was going to make her!

"I'm not your mother, but I am so going to call Buck, and I am going to tell him everything you just told me, f*****g love Tom!? He is a tool; he only does what Jonah wants, and he doesn't care about girls. Please, Sophia, listen to me!" I was screaming it when the door opened, and I saw Tom walk inside, losing whatever smile he had with Kira being happy before she heard me scream. Yeah, I was ruining everyone's day, it seemed!

Sophia made a scowl hearing me, and I didn't care anymore, so what!? They both wanted me to go back, and Tom wanted me to go back to Jonah and her to Buck when I didn't want to!

"Kira baby, we are leaving!" I was picking up Noah when Tom made a big sigh. He could see that I was leaving, knew me better than Sophia, at least he just looked at me like I was crazy, well, I was!

"Mommy, no! please!" Kira ran to Sophia, wrapping her arm around her, making me even angrier. I couldn't have the fucking luxury of letting Kira keep in touch with Sophia, no matter what I was feeling about this!

"Yes! We are leaving right now. Say goodbye to Tom and...." I was getting Jamie when Tom caught me off, taking back the baby I was holding to my distress. Was this, then? Was he going to stop me, take me back to Jonah! Maybe he had been playing me all along because, in the end, that was what I had learned, that I got screwed over by everyone!

"Andrea, stop it! Stop acting crazy. You are not going anywhere; look at you!" Tom was exhausted trying to reason with me, being my only friend, and he was getting tired of me, he was, and I wasn't that stupid!

"Look at me, fucking look at you! Telling Sophia that you love her, what kind of fucking games are you playing here anyway, Thomas!?" I was snarking it when he lost the color on his face, the beard he was having on not covering the shock over me spitting in his face what Sophia had told me!

Tom took a deep breath, trying not to snap at me; everyone else was so fucking calm, just me acting insane like always. They didn't know what I was feeling! Always being hunted down like some animal by people who always had their own agenda, not caring about my kids or me!

"I love her, and there is nothing you can do about that, pretty..." I had my arms crossed, feeling like I was going a round with Jonah in my head, and like always, I was taking it out on him, the never-ending story....

"What?!" Sophia smiled brightly, staring at him with those big blue eyes. Oh shit, so this was real then. What the fuck had happened when I wasn't looking!?

"You heard me, I do love her, and there is not a damn thing you can do to make that go away... and I'm not Jonah, so... you know...fuck you...." He smirked when Sophia came closer, still holding Kira, that had fled to her when this all started when I was losing my shit like always.

"Thomas, she is seventeen, and you are.... Yeah, what, 24?!" I was still being accused, feeling like I should say something, be the fucking voice of reason in all of this. You didn't know that you loved someone when you were that young; look at me, and look at Jonah! "Actually pretty, I'm 22 since you never asked...." He made a chuckle, pulling Sophia in, which was beaming, making hard nausea in my chest come up. They looked f*****g happy. I was jealous, I was, and I wasn't even going to deny it!

I sat on the floor again, feeling so surreal looking at their shit.... They looked great together, didn't they? Happy and so.... Not like me, drowning alone...... oh god... I was bawling, seeing that Tom was still holding my baby. Kira still snuggled against Sophia, scared when I was screaming, they looked like they could do anything, and I was barely hanging on like it was right now.

"That's great.... Just great..." I was still crying, feeling Kira come closer, she wanted me to be happy, and I couldn't be that, not right now. I was alone and hated it. Everything around me felt like shit. No matter what I did, someone screwed me over. Sophia came after, taking her hand on my back, and I didn't move. She should be afraid of what I was doing and breaking down for what felt like the hundredth time since I came here, to be alone in an apartment with my children and hide from everyone. "Andy.... Please.... tell dad the truth, he is reasonable...you know that... still hunched over, was she kidding me? Tell Buck what? I hadn't told him that he had two more sons and that I hated myself for keeping them away from him, no matter what happened between us?

"I can't.... don't you understand that? I can't tell him.... He works for Jonah, same as your boyfriend here..." Tom made a smile hearing that stupid buffoon. Look at him. He wasn't ashamed of being bad, and he wasn't, and I didn't care either; it was just business for him, a way to make money, the same as for Jonah.

"Well, you know what, I bet dad can keep a secret, same as my boyfriend...." Sophia smirked when she liked hearing that, me calling Tom her boyfriend... oh god, now I was encouraging her.... Stupid Andrea...so stupid.

I was still on the floor, hands scraping the cheap floor, this place sucked, and I hated it; every minute of not being at home, in the beautiful home that I had made, was killing me, not just Kira.

"Fine, fuck.... Tell him then.... But.... He is not coming here; if he wants to fucking see me, he better be out in public...." I stopped when Sophia gave the nod. She was happy, pleased that she had gotten her way. Tom was glad he didn't have to watch my kids all the time alone... and he was proud of her. Great... more ways to make me feel like shit, being told off by a f*****g teenager and her stupid boyfriend...

"let us get you off that floor, Pretty...." Tom was holding out his hand when I made a snort at his stupid face; sure, let's get me off the stupid floor when he smiled more at me, fuck he really was stupid, wasn't he? Thought that this would end well, Buck would kill him, and of that, I had no doubt.

"Great.... Let's do this then, tell Buck...." I sighed, taking Jamie up and holding me closer, snuggling the small boy. Tom might not be the only one that Buck was going to kill after hearing that he was the father of the identical boys. He told me that he didn't care who had knocked me up.

"It's going to get better, I promise...." Sophia was making a trying smile when Kira was smiling, too, looking happier than she had done in two months. I was such a fuckup, wasn't I?

"It better be...." I was trying to think about them, I really was and.... I guess the boys deserved to know their dad, didn't they? Same as Kira...

"I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry for yelling at you and...." I stopped when Kira was hugging me. She loved me no matter what, even when I didn't deserve it. F**k, she and my boys, the best thing to ever happened to me... things needed to get better, I didn't know how, but I started with facing Buck... well, it was a start, I guess...