Divorced, But Not Broken
Divorced, but Not broken Chapter 185

Look at that.. just look at that... f**k Andrea... they are so cute..." he was looking over my phone when I was stuffing my face. I was. There was no way around it at the fancy place he had taken me, coming inside easy with me that still didn't look like I belonged

anywhere. On my second plate of pasta with some seafood, it was the best thing I had tasted in years!

"Yeah... yes... that's Kira... and that's Noah and James..." he made a frown hearing me say James to my sigh when I was still chewing, not giving a s**t that I looked like a pig eating; it felt like I hadn't been hungry since I the twins and suddenly, wanting to eat again before the serious man that was my friend.

"Kira... Yeah, that's all Jonah right there...good f*****g luck..." he made a more genuine smile when he was still staring over my pictures of the kids, that still was back at the crappy apartment with Sophia, that probably was spending half her time with her tongue down the throat of Tom.

"Yeah, don't have to tell me.... She is a far*g devil when she wants something...but...she is great....." I snicker, taking a sip from the wine in front of me, looking back up at the warm eyes meeting mine. He really was something, wasn't he? Too bad he was gay, and I couldn't see him as anything other than some weird a*****e I cared for; otherwise, he would have made a great boyfriend... I made another sigh that he followed, smirking like he had been reading my mind, retaking my glass. What the f**k did I know? Maybe he could; he did all this, and he didn't have anyone from his past, unlike me. I got all the f*****g help I needed from Jonah, no matter if I wanted it or not!

"It's good to see you, I mean it... It's not like I keep up with anyone. I got my own circles, and... yeah, I'm one of the few people around these parts that don't do business with the Sullivans..." he made another smile. I bet that was hard. I bet it was hard running a business in a town that had F*****g mob in it and not cooperating with them as everyone else would do, willingly or not.

"f*****g Sullivans..." 1 was drinking more deeply, and my plate was gone when the waitress made a cute smile towards Joseph that, to my surprise, was returning it. He had a great smile; maybe he did smile at people who weren't ruining his life? "Don't even try that s**t with me, Andrea; if Jonah were to walk inside this place, you wouldn't hesitate to talk to him for one second. No matter how much you are cursing his name, you are going to end up on your back, legs apart, and... yeah.." he drank a small sip from his own glass, not even touching his food, and here I thought he said he was f*****g hungry!?

"No! no, I wouldn't, f*****g hate him..." He made another snicker when I was murmuring into my empty glass. What the hell was he talking about anyway? I just surrendered to Jonah, letting him f**K me, that was insulting!

"Oh s**I it's Jonah!" He made a mocking shocked face when my head hipped around, my heart pounding so hard that I thought that everything I had would come up again, thinking for a second that Jonah was coming inside the busy place.

"You fucker!" I scowled way louder than I intended when he chuckled back as he got me. Yeah, well, maybe I still had some feelings for him. Was that so weird, then!? Still cursing under my breath when the waitress returned to refill my glass, only to be dismissed by Joseph, that clearly thought I had enough, which was ridiculous. I wasn't drunk!

"I hate him, you... I don't know what the hell I'm going to call it.... Love or whatever.. take your pick, but you don't hate him... not like me..." He took another bite when I sank into the comfy chair, feeling even sicker... Oh god.... He was right.... that was the worst part, during the one second that I thought Jonah was here, my brain was wondering if he would see me, would he care, would he have his wife with him, and would he think I was still pretty?

"I hate you..." I sighed. What was the point of this anyway?

For him to make me see that I still had feelings for Jonah.

How could I not have that? I had Kira and... well, he was the first guy I really loved, like really loved... no matter how stupid or pathetic that sounded...

"Sure you do, babe... now... drink some damn water.. he pushed over the glass when I made a whimper, still drinking s**t, I was a little drunk, wasn't I? I am still not sure how it happened. I wasn't counting on getting drunk in the middle of the day with a friend that I knew wanted me to do well, he just didn't know how to help me, and I didn't know either

"It has been so long, and he promised me he was leaving his wife, and then I meet Buck, oh it's still such a mess..." My head back and sipped the water, trying to breathe out nausea that was happening, suffocating me; when I was thinking back, it felt like another life, a life that was so good and so bad. I was so stupid back then and still am.

"You are always a mess, Andrea... it's a F*****g personality trait of yours... that's why you fit so good with that fucker..." he snorted, obviously done, not even eating half of his plate to my frown. What a waste... too bad I would hurl if I made even a bite more right now. I was still sitting down when he pulled me up, meeting my eyes when he was still only an inch taller, and I had high heels; it would look like intimacy if he didn't smirk when I was wobbling. I really hated him now, getting me drunk on a f*****g Monday! "Yeah, I am, so what else is new? Not everyone got their g**t together as you do, Mr... fancy pants!" snickering when he did one as well. He was laughing at me, and I didn't care, f*****g let him. I have been through worse.

He didn't answer me at first, just stared at me with cunning eyes. Oh, he was the most cunning guy I had ever seen, more than Jonah or anyone else, and at least he was smart enough to actually not look stupid when he did

Alnght, let's talk business here, Miss Wilson, this isn't just a catch up date I want to know how the f**k you picked up on that error in my system?" Joseph was staring at me like he couldn't believe it, of all the people in the world, he had seen something he had missed. I bet he hated it, every second of it, that pompous prick

"I don't know, I just saw it and couldn't keep quiet. s**t like that bothers me. I used to run a f*****g store, you know, on my f*****g own, didn't know that did you!?" I was waving at the waitress when she turned off again when Joseph made a face telling her to f**k off. s**t, I wished I could do that!

"A store, what? You mean one of the supersaver s**t places you worked over here?" he was annoyed when I was nodding, still drinking water when he sighed like he wasn't that impressed over that. I was. I was a f*****g good manager too! Trained by James, and he was a dense fucker.

What you want a new secretary? sure... sure... I got nothing else going on..." I was staring back at the table, missing my old home, missing f*****g everything, how the hell my feelings were all over the place, first with Jonah and now Buck, I missed that life too; it was a good life to have..... shit... I was sniffling when he looked at me grimly, not wanting me to cry again when I was wiping my eyes fast. Yeah, nobody wanted to see that, me crying.

"I have a secretary and all that s**... I was more wondering if you could take over after that lazy asshole that I fired, it's not the best position to have, but at least it's something." I inhaled upon hearing that. He wanted what, me to take over that dying floor that I had walked inside today? Why!?

"Listen... listen right there, I don't know what you are thinking, this is some kind of charity, but I don't want it and

"Joseph made another smirk when I was sighing, he didn't even listen to me did he, a*****e.

"Charity would be me telling you to take my money for free, this is a f*****g job, Andrea, and from my point of view, you need it." He was waving down the waitress, that perked up right away; seeing his charming smile, I was more amazed he even had one; it still blew my mind.

"f**k, I do... I need it..." I was stroking my hair. It looked like s**t after drinking, and that was some kind of magic. One and a half glasses of wine and my hair looked like I had been sleeping for a week, nothing like the perfection across from me, paying the tab and chitchatting with the flirty waitress smiling. He really was different these days.

"Good! Let's get you home then. I want to see those kids of yours someday. I bet they are better behaved than you are anyway...." I didn't respond to that, just leaned heavily on his body. s**t, he really was something these days, wasn't he? I bet he had a whole f*****g mansion, and I was still struggling to make every week's end, even with Tom helping me.

"f**k you.." I was murmuring it when he smirked, leading me along the tables, the women staring and men too; he looked so handsome, that piece of s** even made some damn handshakes along the way, making sure that everyone saw him holding me before putting me in the back of a car that was going to take me back to the crappy place where my kids were.

"Love you too..." he was putting me in the car when I flipped him off, closing the door when I closed my eyes, thinking about how lucky I was, in some cursed way, I was.