Falling For My Playboy Boss
Chapter 47

Cora's

POV

Collin was angry when we got in the SUV to go back to our apartment. I know that he wanted to say something, but he kept opening and then closing his mouth. Until finally, he said, "Were you really seriously trying to stay somewhere else for the next two nights?" "I was going to give you and Chloe privacy, so I was looking into staying somewhere else. Yes, I was, but everything is booked," I told him.

"Chloe is not coming to the apartment, on this trip, or any trip. She wanted to come over and visit and I had already shot her down. You don't have to worry about her coming over, it will just be us there" Collin said to me.

"She is not the type to give up, she will be back. Good luck with that", I told him and looked out my window to see the passing scenery. Paris was beautiful, even the business district.

"Where would you like to go and eat tonight, Cora?" Collin asked me.

"I am good at just finding something to eat near the apartment or making something to eat in the apartment. I was going to go to bed early so I could get up early and go out and have breakfast, some croissants, and coffee, and then go shopping for my family and friends while I am there. Maybe get a new perfume or book for me. Before, I need to come back and get ready for the banquet", I told Collin.

"I will go with you, Paris is nice, but as with anywhere, a woman alone is not as safe as she is with someone else with her," Collin said to me. I had not thought about that at all. I would not have even thought of asking him to go with me as I didn't for one minute think that he would be OK with going on a shopping trip with me.

"Are you sure? I was not going to bother you with coming with me on my shopping trip. Most men don't like to shop", I told him, surprised that he would even say that he would like to go with me.

"I am sure some men don't like to shop, but I would rather you were safe, so I would go with you. I would be glad to escort you around. Plus, I can carry your bags, leaving you free to continue to shop. I will come in handy for you", I told her and grinned at her. "I just wanted to get a few things for my friends and family. I won't be shopping long; there will be more window shopping and making a few purchases along the way. I will also take pictures with my cell phone and get some postcards for me to put on the fridge to remember the trip. Thank you, I won't be long at all with it, and you can go and get your stuff done as well", I told him.

"It is my pleasure to help you out. Now think about where you want to eat out at. I can get reservations if needed. This will be the only dinner you will be able to get here, as tomorrow is basically booked for the banquet and we fly back on Saturday morning. I can tell the driver and he can take us there if you want, just think about it, or google to see if something jumps out at you that you would like to try", Collin tells me and then picks his phone up and starts replying to texts. I picked up my phone and started to google restaurants.

I found a small restaurant that was actually about 3 blocks away from the apartment called Bistro V, with great reviews. I mentioned it to Collin, who called for a reservation for a table outside. We were seated and each chose a glass of wine to go with dinner and I made a mental note to just stick with one glass, as I usually do not drink alcohol at all. I also had a glass of water with my meal. It was delicious. I had the duck breast and Collin had the shrimp and salmon and he even let me have a piece of the salmon with the satay sauce and a bit of the creamy risotto and I had to keep myself from moaning at the taste of it. I then remembered back to my first date with Michael, when he let me have a bite of his chicken parmesan, and my appetite was gone. I didn't want dessert and I was ready to go. Michael ordered the warm chocolate lava cake and tried to tempt me to take a bite of it, but the memory of sharing the bite off Michael's plate had brought back all of my pain from losing Michael, and I told Collin that I was full and sat back in my chair, looking at the beautiful view, but not enjoying it as much as I had been. He seemed like he wanted to say something to me, as he could tell that the good mood had changed. But he had just finished his dessert and we walked back to the apartment. This trip had just soured in my mouth, and I just wanted to go back home and wallow in self-pity again. I don't know why I am destined to not be happy. I am a good person. Why am I not enough for anyone? I keep my head down and watch for grates and breaks in the sidewalk so I don't trip and fall, as that would just be the best end to the day, falling to the ground in front of Collin. We come back up to the apartment and Collin tells me that he is going to go down to the gym and work out for a little while. He goes into his room and changes and then lets himself out. I take my shower and go and put my PJs on. I had brought my favorite set with me, a little cotton camisole top and shorts set in a rose blush color, that kind of stretched and was so comfortable to sleep in. I decided that I needed some water and opened the door to my room and listened for Collin. Not hearing anything, I went down the hallway and got a bottle of water from the fridge. I hear a key hit the door and go to head back to my room, but Collin enters before I could get out of the kitchen. He stopped short, looking at me, and I looked back at him with my eyes large before I turned quickly and speed-walked back to my room. I shut my door and got back into bed, but I didn't feel like reading anymore. Collin looked great, even with sweat sticking his shirt to his body and I could not allow myself to look down at his sweatpants again. I blush just thinking about it. I went ahead and turned the light off and turned over to sleep. I am so frustrated. Collin had actually been nicer to me on this trip, with the exception of getting onto me for my dress riding up on me, like I deliberately did that. He is so attractive to me, but he is such an a*****e and that takes away almost all of the brownie points he gets for being so attractive. I toss and turn for hours. I was comparing Colling to Michael, and Michael was winning hands down. He was caring, thoughtful, and hot too. But I really wanted to drag my tongue down Collin's washboard abs. What is wrong with me? Why can't I say this is it, I refuse to be attracted to Collin, and be able to stick with it? Why am I still so attracted to Collin when I know that he wants "Shae" and not me? I knew if he found out I was Shae, he would be "all in", wanting to date me then, but I wanted him to want me, Cora, not Shae. Am I wrong for not telling him? For me wanting him to decide for himself, that he wants Cora, and then he gets Shae too, as a bonus prize. I just want to be loved for being me. Is that too much to ask? I already know that I have lost Michael for whatever reason. I have tried not to be upset as it seemed like something that didn't involve me, but it still hurts me. I really cared for Michael and felt totally let down. I realize that I am crying now, and I try to be quiet about it and cry into my pillow, but I end up not being quiet and I find that out when I hear a knock at my door and call out "Come in".

"Are you OK, Cora?" Collin asks me as he puts his head in after opening the door.

"No, but I will be," I told him as I looked over at her, and then I turned back to look at the wall I had been staring at.

"Is it something that I can help you with?" Collins asks me.

"Only if you can tell me what happened between me and Michael?" I told him as I again looked back over my shoulder at him.

I saw him freeze and then slowly shake his head in the negative. I have my answer. Because I already knew that he knew, and Ava did too. I was the only one who didn't warrant an answer or a reason. I turned over in the bed and looked at the wall. "Then there is nothing that anyone can help me with," I told him and continued to cry quietly. I heard the door quietly shut behind him, and I assumed that he had left. I feel the bed dip as Collin lays down next to me curving into my body. I looked over my shoulder at him, frowning, at him and he said, "I am just going to hold you and maybe you can sleep. I know you haven't slept tonight at all. I have heard you tossing and turning back and forth. Michael will talk to you when we get back, I am sure, but it is his story to tell. I will stay on top of the blankets, and I won't do anything to you, Cora. You can trust me. I just wanted to give you a little comfort. I have heard how upset you are. I can hear you crying from my room. I am sorry that you are going through this".

I gave him a nod and allowed his body to curve fully into my back on top of the covers. It is comforting to have him there, and for me not to be able to see his face and pretend that he is Michael. In doing that, I am able to fully relax by hearing his breathing, and I back up more, snuggling into him, and finally, stop crying and go to sleep.