Heartprints in the Void
⊰ 17 ⊱ A Fragile Agreement

I've never dreaded doing something as much as I do today. After a torturously short weekend, I find myself sitting in the parking garage outside of the office building, wishing that I had stayed home.

*I should've called in sick or used my PTO hours...*

I don't know how I'm supposed to face him. It was easier before. I stayed out of his way, and he tolerated me. Now? Now, I don't know if things are going to go back to how they were or if they should-if they ever could. With heavy steps, I somehow manage to find my desk twice as fast as usual.

Well, it feels that way, anyway.

Between brief good mornings, the rest of the team sporadically trickle in, settling at their desks before 8:30AM-except for Cade.

*He's never late...*

I'm not the only one that notices. Krina furrows her eyebrows, glancing up at his empty office.

"Pst." She calls for my attention, whispering, "Did Cade say that he wasn't coming in today?" *Why would I know that?*

I shrug, and before I can mutter a sound, the elevator dings. Krina snaps her head in its direction, watching as Cade emerges.

He wears the same soft smile that he always does, and if I didn't know him any better, I'd believe that this time, it isn't half-hearted.

"Good morning, team," he greets, offering Mateo a light nod as Mateo responds, "Mornin' Boss!"

*Kiss ass.*

"Good morning, Cade!" Krina greets him as he walks by, receiving a nod in return.

I don't know why I expect differently, but I can't help but feel a twinge of disappointment when he looks past me and walks into his office without so much as a glance in my direction.

*I guess that answers my question...*

I wish that I knew what he was thinking or understood what he was feeling. All I'm left with are hopeless assumptions that somehow feel as though it's worse than knowing the truth even if learning that truth would hurt. It kills me.

It kills me not knowing what he plans to do-*if* he plans to do something about it. How did he justify his feelings toward me before? Is he going to try to change how he sees me? Does he even care?

Unsurprisingly, our 9AM meeting quickly rolls around, and it's all more of the same. It's just like any other day, and a part of me knows that I shouldn't be surprised. He was never one to mix his personal life with his job. Ultimately, I'm reminded that here, he's just my boss, and I'm just his subordinate.

At least, that's how it seems throughout the rest of the working day.

"Elys," Krina calls as she rises from her seat and begins packing up her things. "I'm so sorry to have to do this so late, but I was hoping that you could wrap up that project that I sent over on Friday?" *You've gotta be kidding me...*

I glance at the clock at the corner of my screen, reading **4:45PM**.

"I know, it's late. I'm so sorry!" I can see the sincerity in her eyes as she explains, "It's my son's parent-teacher conference at 5:30 today, and I just realized that I need it done by tomorrow morning." *Ugh...fine...*

I offer her a small, forced smile. "It's fine. I'll get it done. Don't worry about it!"

*Incompetence is everywhere...*

I notice the instant relief on her face. She exclaims as she waves and makes her way to the elevator. "Thank you so much! I'll take you out to lunch tomorrow. Bye!"

Between a couple of bathroom breaks, vending machine trips, and endless documentation, by the time I'm done, it's 8PM and I hate myself for not having packed up and taken the rest of the project home when Krina left. *My poor Bubbles...*

I quickly gather my things, standing up only to find Cade doing the same.

...

*Shit.*

It's as if it had been timed perfectly, our shoulders nearly brushing against each other as we walk beside one another, down the walkway and to the elevator.

The silence between us is defeating, and the elevator only seems to make it worse. I pray that the moment the doors open to the parking garage, I can escape and put this behind me.

Unfortunately, as we reach the garage floor and the elevator doors open, my eyes land on his car, parked next to my own.

*Why would he park next to me?!*

Reluctantly, I shoot him a sideways glance before stepping out and making my way to my car. The sound of his dress shoes clicking against the concrete echoes through the nearly empty ramp, and I'm relieved when I walk past his car and he stops.

Keys in hand, I swiftly unlock my car and pull the driver's door open. Slipping my backpack off, I toss it onto the passenger's seat before straightening on my feet to to get in.

I jolt at the sudden feeling of a hand firmly gasping my upper arm. My breath catches in my lungs as I'm yanked out of the doorway, flashbacks from the night at the bar playing in my mind. *No...*

"Stop it! No! Don't touch me!"

I snap my arm out of his grip, attempting to push him away from me as my hands pound against his chest, not having fully registered that the man standing in front of me is Cade.

He doesn't budge, and the feeling of his firm chest lingers in my hands as he steps away, holding his hands up in surrender.

"I'm sorry," he quickly apologizes, likely realizing why I reacted this way. "I didn't mean to scare you." He reiterates, "I'm sorry."

With furrowed eyebrows, I shake my head, trying to catch my breath. "What do you want, Cade?"

He lowers his hands, and for a long moment, he doesn't say a word. He eyes me thoughtfully, and I can tell that whatever it is that he's going to say, he's thought about it for a while.

"I wanted to apologize for how I treated you," he says sincerely. "It wasn't your fault. None of this is your fault."

He pauses, shaking his head with a humorless chuckle as he looks down at the concrete floor. "I don't have anyone to blame but myself. I'm so sorry..." His voice trails off. "Cade, -"

"Ely."

My heart skips a beat. I haven't heard him call me that in 3 years.

"I know you don't owe me anything," he says, his voice hardly sounding like his own, a vulnerability hidden between the lines. "But please, help me."

He's a prideful man, much like his father, and seeing him this way, it almost breaks my heart.

His gaze holds mine, desperation and uncertainty swirling in his eyes. "I want to remember. Please, help me remember."

If this had happened two years ago, or maybe even a year ago, I would've said yes in a heartbeat. I wouldn't question it. I wouldn't be trying to rationalize it. I wouldn't be standing here, thinking about what'll happen when his father learns about me being here or being back in his son's life.

*I can't go through this again...*

*Or worse. *

"I can't do that, Cade," I breathe out. "Your father did this to you to keep you away from me. What'll happen when he finds out that I'm back in your life?" "You don't have to worry about him."

I scoff, crossing my arms beneath my breasts. "Like I didn't have to worry about him before?"

He doesn't respond. I'm right to be afraid, and he knows it.

"Until the end of the year," he suddenly says. "Give me until the end of the year. I'll do everything in my power to make sure that he doesn't find out." "That's n-"

"And if he does, I'll do whatever it takes to protect you," he cuts me off, reassuring me. "I won't let him hurt you again. Just give me until the end of the year." *Can I trust you?*

He's sincere, I know. I don't doubt his intentions, but like Ava said, David is a dangerous man.

I'm sure that over the past 3 years, Cade's been working closely under his father's wing. After all, that's what David wanted long before I came into the picture. *Cade's become a dangerous man too...*

As much as a part of me would like to stick it to his father for what he's done, all I can think about is Cade.

That's the thing about him, the part that makes him the man that I once loved: he helped me when I didn't even know I needed it.

Regardless of what he believes, I owe him this much.

With a shaky breath, I hold his gaze and ask, "What do you need from me?"