Reckless Regrets
Chapter 9

Kade

Tyson and Taylor arrived, then sat with us while Morgan went through the change. He was right in the fact that it would be easier for her. Because she was already part bear, she didn’t have to go through the sickness that most people experience when being turned. She did have the raging fever and chills, and for a while, all her senses were out of whack while her body transitioned.

I was happy that she had decided to do this now while I was here with her. Life was up in the air at the moment, and I would have hated for her to go through such a significant change without me.

“So how do I shift? And can I have conversations with my bear the way these guys do with their wolves?” Morgan asked Tyson.

“It’s hard to explain how to shift; you just do it. Your body knows what has to be done. You just relax as best you can and let it happen. I don’t talk with my bear, he’s just there in the back of my head unless he’s dormant, but I guess you could,” he replied.

She pouted and poked out her bottom l*p.

“That’s boring. Does he have a name?”

“Bear.”

“Ugh, Tyson! I’m glad you weren’t responsible for naming your son; the poor baby would be walking around named ‘Kid.’”

“Could you talk to him if you wanted to? Hold actual conversations?” Taylor chimed in.

“Yes. He’s a part of me, just a quiet part.”

“Well, maybe you can name yours something more exciting, or she’ll have a name already. Once I turned eighteen, my wolf Elias quickly introduced himself. I remember I called him Eli once, and he didn’t respond to me for three whole days; he was not a fan of the nickname. If bears are like wolves, they have distinct personalities and preferences. I’m sure you’ll figure it out and make it work,” I looked at Morgan and said.

“I’m excited to see what she’s like and… what the f**k?!”

Morgan jumped up and frantically looked all over the room, scaring the s**t out of all of us. “I can’t see! What can’t I see?”

Taylor rushed out of the room to grab the doctor, and I gently grabbed onto Morgan’s face.

“What do you mean you can’t see? Like you only see shadows, blobs of color, or nothing at all?” I asked.

“Nothing! I can’t see anything!” Tears began to stream down her beautiful face, and they broke my heart.

“I think this is part of her body’s coding being rewritten, but the doctor would know for sure. Mo? Take a deep breath and tell me what you smell,” Tyson said.

Morgan frantically shook her head and continued to cry. I didn’t know what Tyson was after, but I figured that at the very least, I needed her to focus so she would calm down.

“Sugar Bear, just try, okay? Death deep and tell us. This is going to help,” I said, hoping it was the truth.

She wiped her face and inhaled deep.

“I don’t know, jasmine and pine maybe? And some earthy woodsy scent, like how it smells in the woods after heavy rain. How is this helping me?” She asked.

“Have you ever smelt it before?” Tyson responded.

“No. So you got a new cologne, so what?”

“It’s not me, Mo; you’re smelling Kade. One of the first things you smell when you’re transitioning is your partner. It then gets engrained in your memory forever. Your change is going the way it’s supposed to go. Just calm down and relax. Your eyes had to change along with the rest of you. I’m sure your vision will be back shortly.”

The doctor came in a few minutes later and confirmed Tyson’s statements. All her senses had to reset; the sense sight was just the more dramatic one of the bunch. Once the doctor assured her that everything was okay, she finally laid back down and tried to relax.

I moved my chair to just in front of her face so that when she could see again, the first thing she would see would be me.

“You smell incredible. I’ve never smelled anything like it before,” Morgan told me.

“And so do you. I’ve been obsessed with apple pie ever since I first saw you. The most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” I leaned down and looked into those bright hazel eyes then kissed her nose, making her giggle.

“You’re beautiful too. And you should comb your hair. It’s a bird’s nest.”

“You can see me?”

“I see you. And you’re perfect. The most gorgeous man on the planet. And all mine.”

***

Morgan

Once I got my vision back and went through my other four senses resetting, the rest of the change went smoothly. After the shock wore off, it wasn’t too bad. Honestly, the fever and chills were the worst part. It sucks having your body try to regulate itself for hours on end with no success.

Kade crawled in the bed with me sharing his body heat, and I had fallen asleep in his arms. I was comfortable and content until my entire body felt like it was on fire and had been hit by a train at the same time. I woke up screaming; I couldn’t help myself.

“Morgan, baby, what is it? Talk to me?” Kade begged.

I tried to tell him what was happening, but every time I opened my mouth, another scream escaped. I looked down at my hands and arms, and they were red and irritated. It was like glass was right underneath the surface, trying to push through.

“You need to take her outside now. She needs to shift,” Tyson said.

Kade didn’t ask any questions; he picked me up and ran out of the room and through the closest exit. When we were outside in the crisp night air, he sat me down in the grass and took a step back.

“What happens now?” he asked.

Tyson stepped forward and crouched down beside me.

“Morgan, can you hear me? Nod, if you understand me, sweetie.” I gave a firm nod and looked up at him.

“Good. Now this sounds ridiculous but try to relax and embrace the pain. Focus on your breathing and slow down your heart rate. You need to push yourself into a trancelike state to allow your bear to take over. So, think of something that calms you, makes you happy, makes you feel content, and focus on that.”

Kade then stepped up and laid in the grass next to me and took my hands in his. “We’ve got this Sugar Bear. Focus on me, okay? I’ve got you.”

He was exactly what I needed; nothing and no one could calm me the way he could. I nodded my head and shut my eyes, breathing in his scent and listening to the sound of his heartbeat. The pain got even worst, and it felt like my skin was sliding off my body, so I squeezed Kade’s hands as hard as I could.

“You’re doing perfect, baby, it’s almost over, and I’m right here. You can do it,” he whispered to me.

The burning intensified, and I heard a loud pop, then searing pain radiated down my spine.

“Agh! It hurts so bad! Please make it stop,” I begged.

“Hold on Sugar, you’re so close.”

“I can’t! Make it stop, please!”

Another pop and burn, and I thought I was being crushed from the inside out. When the itching started, I looked down at my hands and saw golden brown fur beginning to sprout from my skin. Finally, it was happening, seeing the change taking place before my eyes gave a minute bit of comfort.

All the pain was for a reason. I shut my eyes and balled myself up as tightly as I could while the itching intensified, and my bones and joints all began to pop, shift, and expand. The pressure in my head was unimaginable; I thought it was going to explode at any second.

“Step back a bit Kade, she’s almost done, and she’ll need her space once she’s fully shifted,” Tyson warned.

I felt Kade k**s my face before he stood up and moved to stand beside a nervous-looking Taylor. As the pain overtook my system, I saw Tyson shift into his massive bear and stand over me. I heard his voice in my head, and it scared me for a moment.

If you can hear me, then you’re almost there. Just focus. Try to find your bear and let her take it from here.

Alright. I can do this.

I slowed my breathing and felt myself begin to calm down. As I did, the pain drastically reduced to the point where it was almost bearable.

Okay, bear. I’m ready for you to take over now. It’s time.

My body began to shake uncontrollably as a deep rumble then growl burst from me. I pushed myself up on all fours and looked down to see thick furry paws and long black claws.

“Yeah! You did it, Sugar Bear. You’re the sexiest bear I’ve ever seen,” Kade proudly yelled out.

How do you feel? Tyson asked.

Exhausted, that was brutal.

I told you it would be, but you did great.

Why are you so much bigger than me?

I had to crane my neck upwards to look at him; this wasn’t fair.

You’re a bear cub, and you’re a female. You’ll get bigger within the next year or so, but you’ll always be smaller than I am.

Not cool. So, what now?

Whatever you want. You’re officially a shifter; welcome to the club, little cousin.

***

Kade

God, she was beautiful.

Tyson was deep dark brown, but Morgan was a golden sandy brown that blended perfectly with her eyes. And she was small, much smaller than him and from the looks of it, smaller than my wolf too. That was surprising to me since all bears I’d ever encountered in the past were always larger than the average wolf, but my Sugar was never one to stick to the rules.

I just had to touch her. I slowly walked over and ran my hands through her fur that felt like the finest silk. I wondered if I could link with her. If she’d been a wolf, we absolutely could, but I wasn’t sure with a bear.

But we were mates, and I could link her as a human, so maybe.

Can you hear me, Sugar?

I can. That’s crazy!

It’s just proof that you’re meant to be mine. You’re beautiful, sweetheart.

Am I? What do I look like?

I could see on her face that she was excited, even under all the fur. I described her to herself in perfect detail, making sure not to leave anything out. As I did, I committed every detail to memory, just as I had done the first night we met.

In a way, this was like our first meeting all over again. This was the first time anyone saw her in bear form, and Elias was finally meeting his mate. This moment was meaningful and transformative in more ways than one.

Do you want to go for a run with me, or did you want to rest? That shift looked painfully draining.

It was, I’ve never felt anything like it. But I want to be out in nature with you. How about a late-night stroll?

That sounds perfect.

I stripped down and shifted into Elias, and just as I suspected, he was much bigger than Morgan.

Seriously? Why am I so damn tiny? This is bullshit!

You’re perfect, Sugar. Don’t worry about it, okay?

She nodded and brushed her head against mine, causing those warm, delicious sparks to shoot off between us. We started to walk to the tree line, her taking cautious, slow steps while she acclimated to her new form before she looked over and me and spoke.

When all this is over, I’m going to mark you. I don’t know when or where; I just know that I am. Then you’re going to make me your wife.

There’s nothing I’d like more.