The Mates of Monsters
Chapter 19

I wake in my bed with my choices from last night creeping back into my memory. I lay there and hide under the blankets, knowing that wine or illness or stupidity aren't possible excuses for any of it. It was all me, and she's still here.

abrupt banging is followed by Jeremy's voice calling, "Brigette? Brigette, you've over-slept."

I don't think my defensive, angry self is back because the first thing I thought of when I opened my eyes was our kiss, and the last thing I felt was regret. My eyes close again to relive the moment in my head, but my dreaming is cut short by firm knocks on the door. The Jeremy gets me up-and once I'm ready to leave the house he takes me to do my first task on my schedule. "I thought we were done with busy schedules now that Alpha Nicodra is gone," I say as I shield my eyes from the sun.

"This is not busy in the slightest. You have your meeting with the Alpha."

"What? What meeting?"

Jeremy glances back at me. "He wants you to learn the basics of self-defense. We had to move this lesson because of Alpha Nicodra's visit. We've had this conversation."

"Yeah, b-but they just left this morning. I thought I would have more time."

"Time to do what?" He questions.

"Prepare. I needed to prepare for this lesson."

Jeremy assures me, "The Alpha is aware you lack these skills. Everything you do will be for beginners-there's no need to prepare."

"So the Alpha is waiting for us now?"

"Yes. I'm taking you to the grounds where all pack members learn and practice these things. Remember the tour? You've been here before." "Right. Of course. I remember."

Jeremy looks back again. "Are you feeling alright? I told you to watch how much you drink at events."

"I'm fine, just tired, I guess."

"Good. There's no room in the Alpha's schedule this week to push it back again."

"Really? So the Alpha is busy then? He has no time to-to do anything else?"

Jeremy explains, "There is time set aside in the evenings since he prefers to have his nights open. There is no room to reschedule his days, however. It's common for Alphas to spend such time at home-dinner with the family, time with the Luna, and so on." "Did I ever ask how you know all these things?"

"I've worked for leadership before, and this is far from my first pack."

I consider, "But you're not old. All the men who helped my father and previous Alpha were old."

"I'm not exactly young anymore either," he mutters. "Now come along; we're going to be late."

My gut stirs. I'm sure David can act discrete, but my feelings will be as clear as day, and I can only hope this meeting is private. I don't need other pack members witnessing my blushing and stumbling and gushing; it's already hard enough knowing David has such access to my truths.

He's going to be touching me, and I can already feel his grip on my upper arms, holding me in place. "Who's going to be there?" I ask suddenly.

"I'm not sure."

"Could there be a lot of people? I-I don't really want people watching me as I struggle to defend myself. That can't be good for appearances."

Jeremy ignores me as he catches sight of my mate. David is speaking with Tarlo, but as he sees us approaching, he pats Tarlo on the shoulder and his Beta walks off. There is a large, blue mat dragged out onto the cut grass where David is standing. A few people are scattered in the distance, talking or practicing. There is even a pair of shifted wolves sparing with each other, and my eyes fixate on them, still not used to seeing two wolves fight.

It isn't unheard of-wolfs fighting. My pack simply managed to avoid the need to do so. I'm sure there was a situation or two with guards and threats at our borders, I just never witnessed it. Something about it seems natural, though. Such beast-like beings were made to fight, in a sense. Why else would we be equipped with these teeth, and claws, and strength? But I was always kept safe, kept away. I wonder what my family would think if I sparred as these wolves are now.

"I apologize for our tardiness," Jeremy says to David.

David looks at me and says, "It's alright. You're welcome to stay, Jeremy."

"I'll wait on the sidelines. Brigette and I have our meeting afterward."

Great, another lesson on history, government and etiquette. Jeremy steps to the side and David and I are left to get to work. I wait awkwardly and stare down at the mat.

For each response he teaches me, David acts out a scenario, him being the bad guy and me being myself. He'll grab my hands, arms, neck, legs-all with an unrealistic gentleness. Each time we start a new scenario and I am once again stuck, I think about him suddenly grabbing harder and never letting go. He'll bring his arm around my throat and squeeze and throw me to the ground. He'll pin me and smile because no matter how hard I push, I won't be able to get him off. I wait for him to switch into this sadistic character I've painted in my head, no longer paying attention to the instructions I'm supposed to be following to release myself.

He has me on the mat, laying on my back with his hand latched on my ankle. He tells me to kick and fight but my head is lost in the clouds. "Brigette," he calls. When I don't respond, he pulls my leg and I slide down. He comes over me and looks at my face. "Are you listening?"

"I don't like this," I tell him.

"I just want you to be prepared. I'd feel better if you knew these things."

My head rolls to the side. Jeremy is sat on a bench with his laptop open. "Who's going to attack me? Rogues? How would they get past the borders? Or is it deceivers you're worried about?"

David sighs and lifts me up.

"Or is it other Alphas like Nicodra?"

"That's enough."

I ask, "Why can't I know?"

"It's anyone, Brigette."

"Even you?"

"No, not me."

"Promise," I say softly, not expecting the word to leave my lips.

David looks back to me. "I promise. Now come on, we're done for today."