The Mates of Monsters
Chapter 55

He lets me know when we're crossing the border and points to the brush. I squint then notice the figure hidden behind layers of wood-a guard. "There's another on our left," he says.

The two wolves watch as we pass, moving from our land to no man's land, as I've heard my father call unclaimed territory. Rogue wolves, humans, bears-anything is free to wander here, maybe even the things my father warned me of since I was old enough to walk. Living in the mountains, in dense forest and haunting solitude, beings far scarier than the typical flesh and blood are whispered between children and warned by parents. My father told me not to go out alone, not too far from the land or too late at night. He said there are creatures that not even we can fend off.

I knew the traditional rules: if you hear screaming, crying, voices, your name-come home. If it gets too quiet-come home. If you feel a stalking presence-come home. Shift and don't look back.

"Up here," David steals my attention and motions ahead. The ground transforms from packed dirt to sheets of rock, angled and smoothed by the wear of the world. I pick up my pace as the distance disappears and is replaced by blackening sky. The rock structure beneath our feet cuts off and hangs over the land, a diving board fit for a giant to cannonball into the trees far below. David eases me from the ledge.

"My father."

My eyes mimic his gaze. Along the other end of the cliff lays a large, brown wolf, similar in color to David's but a hair lighter. David tells me to wait here as he walks over to talk to him. I suppose Ken won't be giving much of an answer back.

I cross my arms and hold myself, unable to hear David's words but able to see his mouth move. He pats the wolf's back and his father merely peers up at him before settling his head between his front legs against the earth. I breathe in the cooled night air and wonder how his father must feel without his mate, without Anne.

He roamed the world-lost-no longer himself. He left his life as Alpha behind and then what? What did he do for those two years out there alone? It's evident that his time as a nomad-as David put it-wasn't to enjoy new cultures or see the world or take a vacation from his years of hard work. What if he simply roamed with nothing else to do but run from the pain of a broken home?

What would this place be, to me, without David? I'm sure I would run from it too-the constant reminders, the empty bed. Without my mate, living in that house would be like living in one of my nightmares for the remainder of my days.

Ken's wolf heaves itself up on tired bones. David watches as he ambles back into the trees, assumingly heading to his guest house, keeping his promise to David.

David makes his way back to me, but I worry myself when I consider the day that he doesn't.

I walk to my parent's guest house after breakfast to give them the official Brigette-guided tour, but when I get there, my mother tells me my father is tied up on the phone. His muffled voice sounds from upstairs, behind a closed door. "He just needs a moment," my mother assures me and sits us in the living room for the time being. "We can chat until he's done, can't we?"

"Sure," I say and lean back against the chair, still held upright by a well-stuffed pillow.

"Actually, there was something I thought we should talk about. I thought now would be a better time than ever."

It seems every conversation with my parents these days stems from their ulterior motives. Now that I'm no longer a little girl, they have embraced my adulthood with a willingness that I force myself to ignore. "What is it?" I ask, playing along.

"Okay, so I'm sure you're well aware by now of the duties placed on you as a Lun-"

"Mom," I interrupt, "I do know. We don't have to go over it."

"Will you let me speak?"

I hold my breath in my chest. "Yeah, fine, go on."

"I don't want you to feel pressured, Brigie. I know how you are; you're so headstrong and you do things your way, and that's good. I want you to do what you want to do, when you want to, with your body."

I roll my lips together and study the coffee table in front of us. "It's funny," I say, speaking my mind, "everyone talks to me like having a baby is the last thing I'd want to do. Like...they don't want to scare me off, but they don't want me to believe it's a nice thing either." My mother scoots along the couch onto the cushion closer to me. "It can be scary. It isn't easy. Your body changes and it doesn't always feel like it's changing for the better. When I was pregnant with you, everyone told me about morning sickness early on, and I thought I could handle that. Little did I know my sickness occurred morning, noon, and night, all throughout the pregnancy. The look of things, the smell of things, the taste of things sent me running to the toilet. I didn't glow, and I surely didn't feel the wonders of pregnancy the other women raved about. I was hot, and swollen, and sore. But here you are, Brigie. You sacrifice your body to create life, and creating life-it terrified me.

"Now I can't even properly warn you because I was not in your situation. Your baby might require more, might cause more, might feel different in ways that exceed the variables of our normal pregnancies. They're not the same as us," she says, referring to the Alphas. "I know, and I know it won't be easy. Honestly, I don't feel like there's a choice to make, not because everyone is pressuring me, but because..." I adjust myself and breathe out. "I would do anything for him. I-I love him so much that I would cut out my own heart and give it to him if he needed it. And I don't know if I should feel that way because what's having a baby compared to that? I'm not scared of having children, mom. I'm scared of how much I need him. Ken's mate died. I don't know if I could go on if something happened to David." She gets up and moves to the arm of my chair, leaning over me and bringing her arms around me. "Oh, Brigie," she coos, "don't worry yourself like that."

"What if he dies first?" I ask, not embarrassed by my looming tears. "I just don't want to be here without him. Y-You don't understand, mom. Nowhere is safe. He has a target on his back, and he tells me that we can't trust anyone. What if someone hurts him? There are Alphas out there that are not good people, and they're willing to kill anyone if they have to. And what do I do if they come for him?"

Her hand circles on my back as she continues to hold me so tightly that I feel like a caught bird threatening to fly away. I don't think there's anything she could tell me to help me out of this pit; it just feels good to tell someone.

I just want someone to promise me that he'll always be with me and mean it. But I'm afraid the only trustworthy promise would be the Goddess' words.